And, annoyingly, it was an absolute cracker.

Two contrasting styles, two heavyweight teams going at each other, and another reminder of exactly why this rivalry is so bloody good. Unfortunately, this one didn’t go our way, which leaves the series locked at 1–1 and sets up a massive, mouth-watering Game Three — the unofficial decider at FNB Stadium in the Republic.

Far more important, obviously, than that little moneymaker happening in Baltimore.

We go deep on the second Test: where it was won and lost, what the Boks did well, what the All Blacks will be kicking themselves about, and what needs to change ahead of the big one.

Tony also goes on a completely calm and measured rant about the outrage surrounding Dave Rennie having the sheer audacity to mention something to the media. We certainly can’t think of any other international rugby coach whose name begins with R who might occasionally use the media to apply a little pressure…

Cough cough, Rassie. Cough cough.

We also touch on the Lions v All Blacks opportunity that popped up during the week, start building toward the enormous third Test, and — because we’re nothing if not thorough — try not to completely forget about our friends in Australia and Argentina.

The Wallabies are quietly putting together something resembling a winning streak. What a time to be alive.

It’s a bit of a doozy.

Grab a beer, settle in, and enjoy.

In a week where the hype is about as hyped as it can possibly be, the speculation is about as speculative as it can possibly be, and our bullshit talking is about as bullshit as it can possibly be… we are finally here.

We sit on the precipice of one of the biggest rugby events in recent memory — more than 30 years in the making — as Test One of the Greatest Rivalry Series: All Blacks vs South Africa is about to kick off.

The All Blacks arrive after three relatively straightforward outings against South African opposition. There was a bit of a wobble against the Stormers early doors, but the Sharks and Bulls were dispatched without too much drama.

So… should New Zealand be feeling confident?

Or has Rassie Erasmus been playing 4D chess again, deliberately lulling the All Blacks into a false sense of security? Were the South African franchises mysteriously instructed not to box kick so the All Blacks wouldn't get any proper preparation?

Conspiracy theories? Absolutely.

Any chance we actually know what we're talking about? Probably not.

Then there are the Boks themselves — back-to-back world champions, as they very much enjoy reminding everybody, over and over and over again.

They've been relatively quiet, relatively private, but now it's all starting to come to the fore. Are they slightly undercooked? Could there be some rust after their last showing against Argentina? Or was the evil mastermind Rassie simply keeping his powder dry for the series that really matters?

The bullshit is high. The speculation is higher. And the hype is very, very real.

And it's about to get even more real.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

A massive thank you to metal's greatest band, Sorcerot, for sponsoring the podcast. Go check out their album Rotten Magic at the link below, and tell them you were sent by the good fellas at Two Cents Gets Distracted.. Go here to here their awesome Album Rotten Magick - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LiWye7-B2es&list=RDLiWye7-B2es&start_radio=1&t=1318s

For 40 glorious minutes at Eden Park, they were all over a slightly flailing Irish side. Ireland fought their way back into it after halftime, but putting 41 points on them and winning by 19 is a bloody good result. More importantly, it gives us a little bit of—keyword—optimism heading into the Greatest Rivalry Series.

Speaking of which, the Boks—or the B-Boks, C-Boks, or whatever version of the Boks was rolled out this week—put Wales away without too much trouble. South African fans weren’t exactly thrilled by the dropped ball and generally ordinary-looking performance, but they still won 43–0, and that scrum somehow looks even more terrifying than ever.

So, naturally, we dive into the All Blacks–Springboks rivalry and start looking ahead to the series we’ve all been waiting for. Tony throws a little chum into the water, so try not to bite too hard. It’s all banter at the end of the day. Probably. Rassie is definitely in our heads.

Elsewhere, Australia gave Joe Schmidt a fitting send-off by dominating Italy, Fiji scored some absolutely ridiculous tries despite losing to Scotland, and England and Argentina appeared to cram an entire year’s worth of yellow cards into one fiery, chaotic match.

Coming on the back of the spicy England–Argentina Football World Cup semifinal, the whole thing felt suitably hostile, slightly unhinged and, eventually, pretty entertaining.

We cover all of that, talk plenty of rugby and sprinkle in the usual amount of bullshit.

There’s no episode next week, but after the break, we’re going deep into South African content as the Greatest Rivalry Series finally arrives.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

The All Blacks kicked things off against Italy in a match we were desperately hoping would be the moment Dave Rennie’s new team finally clicked. That may be a little demanding in only week two, but they certainly didn’t click during a fairly shambolic opening 40 minutes.

Things improved dramatically for about 15 minutes in the second half, when New Zealand suddenly piled on the points and eventually cruised to a 30-point victory. Will Jordan scored his 50th Test try, reaching the mark faster than any All Black before him, while Anton Segner made his long-awaited debut and Moby provided a tidy little cameo off the bench in his first Test as well.

Australia then produced a genuinely excellent first half against France, followed by an absolute dog-shit second half against France. What began as a hugely encouraging performance became another deeply deflating evening for Wallabies supporters around the world.

Ireland faced Japan in that famous fortress of Japanese rugby: Newcastle, Australia.

Why Newcastle, Australia, you may ask? Excellent question. Apparently Ireland didn’t fancy travelling to Japan, pushed their weight around and got their way. Japan made the match considerably tighter than expected, but Ireland eventually showed their class and pulled away.

England absolutely pumped Fiji, while the game of the round may have come in South Africa, where Scotland the Brave were once again incredibly brave.

The Springboks may not have fielded their absolute strongest side, but they were still expected to dominate. Instead, Scotland pushed them far closer than the final score suggests. With a little more clinical finishing, a bit more composure near the line and perhaps slightly more defence, this genuinely could have been the day Scotland finally won in the Republic.

Sadly, it wasn’t to be.

This week’s beers were kindly supplied by the great Andrew Stark from Tempo Rehab. Check out his work at temporehab.com and have a look at the Tempo Rehab YouTube channel as well. https://www.youtube.com/@tempo_rehab

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Leinster pumped the Bulls in Ireland to claim the URC title. Our friends the Hurricanes looked incredible and gale-forced their way to a totally, utterly, humiliating pumping of the Chiefs in a frankly silly 60–50 loss. And in what is usually a bit of a laugh, the Barbarians taking on South Africa in the Republic looked slightly less like a laugh this time, as the Baa-Baas also received a reasonably serious pumping.

So if you were in dire need of some tight rugby, like some of us were, this was absolutely not the weekend for you.

That brings the domestic season to a close, with a little sprinkling of international flavour thrown in. But maybe the biggest story of the week eclipsed all of that: Dave Rennie naming his inaugural All Blacks squad.

Four new names were included, perhaps none more interesting than Anton Segner. The German-born loose forward came to New Zealand as a 15 or 16-year-old on what was basically a student exchange, and now, ten years later, he’s in the All Blacks. Quite an incredible story — especially after standing out in a poorly performing Blues outfit like a diamond in a sea of poo.

Stop it.

Also, a massive thanks to Allouran for the wine. We appreciate it very, very much.

Grab a beer and enjoy. Or, in this case, maybe a wine.

Leinster pumped the Bulls in Ireland to claim the URC title. Our friends the Hurricanes looked incredible and gale-forced their way to a totally, utterly, humiliating pumping of the Chiefs in a frankly silly 60–50 loss. And in what is usually a bit of a laugh, the Barbarians taking on South Africa in the Republic looked slightly less like a laugh this time, as the Baa-Baas also received a reasonably serious pumping.

So if you were in dire need of some tight rugby, like some of us were, this was absolutely not the weekend for you.

That brings the domestic season to a close, with a little sprinkling of international flavour thrown in. But maybe the biggest story of the week eclipsed all of that: Dave Rennie naming his inaugural All Blacks squad.

Four new names were included, perhaps none more interesting than Anton Segner. The German-born loose forward came to New Zealand as a 15 or 16-year-old on what was basically a student exchange, and now, ten years later, he’s in the All Blacks. Quite an incredible story — especially after standing out in a poorly performing Blues outfit like a diamond in a sea of poo.

Also, a massive thanks to Allouran for the wine. We appreciate it very, very much.

Grab a beer and enjoy. Or, in this case, maybe a wine.

Instead, we got two absolute pumpings.

First up, the Crusaders — the playoff specialists, the heartbreak merchants, the team who have ruined so many perfectly good weekends for so many perfectly decent rugby fans — went up against one of the four teams of the year, the Chiefs.

We were all set for a tight one. A proper semifinal. A clash of heavyweights.

What we got was the Chiefs putting 30-plus points on them in the first half and turning the whole thing into something closer to a public execution than a rugby match. The score settled a little in the second half, but let’s be honest, the damage was done.

As neutrals, we probably wanted a contest.

As people who have watched the Crusaders cause untold emotional damage for years, we also didn’t entirely hate seeing them get pumped.

Then it was time for our Blues, who had absolutely no business being anywhere near a semifinal, but through the luck of some playoff-format nonsense found themselves lining up against the high-flying Harlem Hurricanes — or, frankly, the Harlem Globetrotter Hurricanes.

The Canes were slick. They were sharp. They were ridiculous.

There was a touch of skulduggery from our man Cam Roigard, but he got on with it, lifted the tempo, and the Hurricanes started doing Hurricanes things. To be fair to the Blues, the first half was at least a little tighter than the Chiefs-Crusaders game, with only four points in it at the break.

Then the second half happened.

The Hurricanes showed their class, the Blues forgot how defence works, and the Canes ended up putting 50-plus on them. Mercifully, the Blues’ season is now over, and we can all move on with our lives.

So now we get the final the competition probably needed: Chiefs vs Hurricanes at the Cake Tin. The two best, most in-form teams in Super Rugby going head-to-head.

Will they fill the tin to the brim? Who knows.

Can we please, for the love of all things holy, get a competitive game?

We also have a chat about the URC final coming up, with Leinster taking on the Bulls, and because this is Two Cents Gets Distracted, there are naturally a couple of technical difficulties to keep things spicy.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Massive thanks as well to Carl from Republic Home and his dad David for sponsoring the podcast. You can get 10% off by using the code 2CGD at republichome.com. Thanks for the beers, lads.

The URC probably delivered the better drama. Leinster were ultimately too good for the Stormers, but the Stormers made them work for it for a decent stretch. Meanwhile, the Bulls pulled off a cracking come-from-behind win against Glasgow, who were playing at Murrayfield — when, let’s be honest, they probably would’ve much rather been at their actual home ground.

In Super Rugby, things got a bit ridiculous. The Hurricanes, who qualified number one, played the Brumbies, who qualified sixth, and absolutely pumped them. Which raises the very fair question: what was the point of that game? The format seems designed to suck the jeopardy out of the tournament just so we can squeeze in three quarter-finals. Honestly, just give us a top four and be done with it.

Elsewhere, the Blues looked like they remembered how to play rugby for brief periods, before also remembering they had the defensive structure of a wet paper bag. The Crusaders put plenty on them down in Christchurch, and yet somehow, despite losing a worrying number of games in a row, the Blues are now semi-finalists thanks to the “lucky loser” system.

The best Super Rugby game of the weekend was probably Chiefs v Reds, even though the Chiefs still managed to win it relatively comfortably and end the Reds’ season.

So yes, we talk dads, rugby, playoff formats, lucky losers, one-sided quarter-finals, and the general absurdity of it all. Tony, in particular, has a bit of a whinge.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

But fear not, because the rugby chat survives.

After the usual world-class nonsense, we dive into the URC, where the semi-finalists are locked in and rugby fans in New Zealand are, of course, absolutely buzzing with excitement. No irony there whatsoever. In all seriousness, though, the final four should make for some cracking clashes, and we break down what’s coming.

Then it’s over to the final round of Super Rugby, where the Blues continued their late-season collapse by getting absolutely pumped by the Mooloo men of Waikato. Moana Pasifika delivered the feel-good story of the week, grabbing a win in what may sadly be their final game in existence. Meanwhile, the Crusaders — being the absolute bastards they are — appear to be coming right at exactly the right time.

And who gets to face them next week in Christchurch, at their shiny new stadium? The Auckland Blues, currently riding a four-game losing streak. Lovely.

Even better, thanks to the bizarre “lucky loser” setup, the Blues might still sneak through even if they lose. Because apparently even finals rugby doesn’t need actual jeopardy anymore.

We also touch on the Force, Waratahs, Highlanders, and look ahead to a weekend of knockout rugby, jump flights, jump sticks, and all the usual nonsense.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

This week: Leinster do what Leinster do best — rock up with what is basically a full international side (plus newly signed 88-test All Black Rico Ioane) and somehow still get absolutely folded in a big knockout game. Bordeaux go back-to-back in the Champions Cup and, sadly for the neutrals, it wasn’t even close. A full-scale French demolition job.

We also discuss the absolute unit that is Ben Tameifuna — less “tighthead prop” and more “small tectonic plate” — while Maxime Lucu continues to prove that if a certain Antoine Dupont didn’t exist, he might genuinely have a case as the best halfback on the planet right now.

Back home, the Chiefs and Crusaders gave us an absolute belter, and annoyingly… those pesky Crusaders are starting to look properly dangerous again. The Force’s finals dream is over, the Reds did enough to sneak through, and thankfully our Blues avoided embarrassment by employing the elite tactical strategy known as “having the bye.”

We cover every Super Rugby game, throw in a dangerous amount of nonsense chat, and somehow end up talking ourselves into several terrible opinions along the way.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Once we actually get to rugby, the big topic this week is the South African URC sides reportedly considering pulling out of the Champions Cup. Is the travel just too brutal? Are the players being run into the ground with basically year-round rugby? Are the South African teams really adding enough to justify the chaos? And are fans actually invested in it? We dive into all of it.

Back home, we break down another massive weekend of Super Rugby, including the Blues putting in an absolutely grim performance against the Hurricanes. Genuine dogs balls stuff. The Canes, meanwhile, just keep rolling from strength to strength.

We also cover a couple of brutal injuries from the weekend. Damian McKenzie copped a nasty head knock that’ll likely sideline him for a few weeks, while poor old Tangi Tao suffered a season-ending injury at the worst possible time after pushing hard into All Blacks contention. Proper heartbreaking luck for the bloke. As always, there are tangents, nonsense, overreactions, probably a few terrible takes and a couple of beers along the way.

Grab a beer and enjoy

Leinster Rugby nearly pulled off an all-time choke job but somehow held on in a proper squeaky-bum finish—thanks in no small part to the unlikely Irish saviour Rieko Ioane, who shut the gate on a last-gasp attack that would’ve sent Dublin into meltdown.

Over in the other semi, Union Bordeaux Bègles got the job done against Bath Rugby in a cracking contest… though you’d be forgiven for missing parts of it while Andy Goode carried on like the ref had personally wronged him. Maybe he had a point—but mate, we get it.

Back home, Super Rugby Pacific rolls on:

• The Hurricanes keep humming, with Ruben Love making a serious case as the next All Blacks 10 👀
• The Crusaders… still lurking. Doubt them at your own risk
• The Blues got it done after a shaky start against Moana Pasifika
• The Highlanders and Fijian Drua battled to a sweaty stalemate
• The Western Force are making a cheeky late push after knocking off the Waratahs
• And the Reds piled more misery on the sliding Brumbies

All that… plus a generous serving of absolute nonsense.

Grab a beer and enjoy 🍺

The Kiwi teams absolutely ran the table. The Crusaders kicked things off by beating Waratahs, sending the Christchurch faithful home very happy in game one. The Blues nearly gave their fans heart failure but somehow scraped past the Queensland Reds in full squeaky-bum, extra-time chaos — thanks in part to a late penalty from Fraser McReight that went the wrong way.

The Highlanders got the job done over Moana Pasifika, while the Chiefs handled the Fijian Drua. And the Hurricanes? Fehi Fineanganofo, WHAT A FREAK, too bad he's going to Newxastle. All in all — an absolute belter of a weekend, unless you’re Australian… in which case, maybe skip this one. We crack a couple of beers, break down the action, butcher a few names, and talk a healthy amount of nonsense along the way.

Grab a beer and enjoy

After a month off while Tony went and did the whole “get married and eat his bodyweight in Thailand” thing, Two Cents Gets Distracted returns — slightly heavier, slightly rustier, and walking straight into some genuinely grim news.

This week, we unpack the potential demise of Moana Pasifika. What does it mean for Pacific rugby — a region that has given the game so much talent, passion, and identity? And more importantly… what now? Is there a real path forward, or are we watching another crack form in the already shaky foundations of Super Rugby?

Which leads us to the bigger question — what even is the future of Super Rugby? Is this still a competition built to last, or are we quietly edging toward the slow fade of what was once the pinnacle of provincial rugby?

Not all doom and gloom though — because the footy absolutely delivered.

We had a proper top-of-the-table belter between the Chiefs and the Hurricanes, the Blues nearly pulled off the all-time choke in a game they had no business losing, and the Force did the unthinkable by knocking over the Crusaders (which, let’s be honest, brings a smile to most faces).

All that, plus the usual nonsense, tangents, and questionable takes.

We’re back. Grab a beer and enjoy.

Eventually — and we mean eventually — we stumble our way into some rugby after sampling some deeply questionable smoothie beers courtesy of our mate Erin. They’re odd. Very odd.

On the field, James Slipper cements himself as an all-time great, breaking Wyatt Crockett’s Super Rugby caps record, and the Brumbies celebrate in style with a gritty, never-say-die win that looked well beyond them at one point.

Proper tough footy. Elsewhere: The Reds get it done in Lautoka, while the Drua forget how to catch and Glenn Jackson nearly combusts Moana Pasifika come unstuck against the Crusaders at North Harbour The Hurricanes continue their upward trend, brushing aside a struggling Highlanders side And the rest? Rugby happened. It always does. We talk about it… sort of.

Plus, the return of the world’s fastest-growing game show: 🎯 Post URC Post-Match Predictions — where Tony, who hasn’t watched a single URC game (because… 3am), attempts to predict results after they’ve already happened. It’s as stupid as it sounds. 🚨 Important announcement: This is our last episode for a little while! We’re taking about a month off while Tony ties the knot and heads off on honeymoon.

So for now — Grab a beer and enjoy

Running on fumes and questionable life choices, Tony and Mark try to make sense of a weekend that had everything.

Wales finally get their moment—after weeks of showing promise without reward, they get the chocolates against a dangerous Italy side that just couldn’t quite fire when it mattered.

Scotland… well, Scotland did what Scotland do against Ireland. Ireland get the job done with a bonus point win, and for a brief, slightly nauseating moment, found themselves as diehard England fans, praying for one last twist.

And then… it happened.

A battered, doubted, and heavily criticised Steve Borthwick-led England side almost pulled off the unthinkable—before Thomas Ramos, the ice man himself, stepped up and absolutely ripped their hearts out with a clutch extra-time penalty to seal it for France.

Three unreal games. Absolute chaos. Championship on the line. Limbs everywhere.

We break it all down—with a healthy dose of nonsense, questionable analysis, and lingering hangovers.

Apologies in advance for any audio issues… but grab a beer and enjoy 🍻

Meanwhile, Scotland pulled off a massive upset over France, denying the French a Grand Slam and blowing the Six Nations wide open heading into the final weekend. Now the title is still up for grabs, with Ireland and France both in the hunt in what promises to be a blockbuster finish.

And Wales… the team we all confidently labelled as absolute rubbish… might not actually be rubbish. They went down to Ireland, but defended like demons and showed genuine signs of life, including one of the most glorious prop-forward tries you’ll ever see.

We also cover the huge news of Dave Rennie being appointed the next All Blacks coach through to the World Cup, wrap up all the Super Rugby action, and spend a completely reasonable amount of time gloating about the fact that our Blues beat the Crusaders… and we were there to see it.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

A Big Thankyou to Rugby Historian!!

Go check out their awesome site! rugbyhistorian.com

With Europe taking the week off, all eyes turned south — and unfortunately for us (and especially for Mark), Australia decided to wake up and choose violence. The Blues found yet another soul-crushing way to lose, going down in the 81st minute in overtime. Yes, the 81st. Yes, Mark is still processing. No, he is not okay.

The Crusaders finally remembered how to win, knocking off the Chiefs after the Waikato boys absolutely flew out of the blocks. The Drua defended the fortress in Lautoka, toppling a fancied Hurricanes side and proving that Fiji remains one of the most terrifying away trips in world rugby.

With no major international storylines to anchor us, things got loose. There’s fear. There’s frustration. There’s a generous serving of absolute nonsense. And somehow, we still talk rugby.

Strap in. Grab a beer. And enjoy the spiral.

Down south, the rugby gods delivered something even more outrageous: the Crusaders didn’t just lose — they got hammered. The Brumbies dropped a half-century on them in Christchurch for their first win there in 26 years. Nobody saw it coming, everybody enjoyed it (well… almost everybody). Wales, after weeks of looking like rugby’s saddest soap opera, finally resembled a functioning rugby side again. They still went down to a street-tough, slightly fortunate Scotland — but at least this time there were signs of life and something to actually laugh with instead of at.

We also get stuck into France continuing to look like the team to beat, Italy continuing to be awkwardly competitive, and a Super Rugby round that delivered chaos, entertainment, and confirmation that the Blues still look shaky even when they scrape past the Force. Upsets, chaos, schadenfreude, and a healthy dose of nonsense.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Lose to Italy… then immediately turn around and snap England’s 12-game winning streak.

Yes, the Scots beat the English. The rugby world rejoiced. Bagpipes were heard from space. We are, frankly, delighted.

Meanwhile, Wales have somehow discovered new geological layers of rock bottom. France treated them like training cones, playing Harlem Globetrotters rugby with offloads, flair, and the kind of ominous swagger that should concern literally everyone.

Italy vs Ireland? Suddenly… tight? Competitive? Slightly terrifying if you’re Irish? Is this an Italian renaissance, or are we witnessing the slow fade of Ireland’s golden generation? We attempt to answer that question with absolutely no qualifications whatsoever.

Plus — Super Rugby is back! The Crusaders lost (we celebrate responsibly). The Blues also lost (less fun). Balance has been restored to the universe.

All that, plenty of nonsense, and a decent helping of rugby chat.

Grab a beer and enjoy

Then, we revel in Italy’s glorious ambush of Scotland,proving once again that it’s tough being Scottish. And, if you thought Wales couldn’t dig deeper, think again: their performance was a full-on Fawlty Towers episode, while England casually strolled in and gave them a rugby spanking.

We also look forward to Super Rugby getting started and unpack some of the new law changes.

Grab a beer and enjoy

We also turn our attention north, with the Six Nations kicking off — the “greatest rugby championship in the world”

As ever, expect a healthy mix of hot takes, half-baked theories, international rugby hype, and a solid helping of nonsense.

Welcome back to Two Cents Gets Distracted — where we talk a lot of rubbish and just enough rugby to justify it.

Grab a beer and enjoy

Big thanks to sports4cast for the beers! - https://sports4cast.com/

From Ardie Savea’s alleged refusal to return under Razor, to questions about leadership, culture, and where New Zealand rugby goes next, Two Cents Gets Distracted drops an out-of-season emergency pod to unpack the biggest coaching bombshell in years.

Grab a beer and Enjoy

The All Blacks have drawn first blood in the Greatest Rivalry Series, knocking over the much-vaunted Springboks in a result that has Tony desperately attempting to remain humble and gracious in victory. Unfortunately, humility has never really been his strong suit. Mark is much better at that sort of thing.

And somehow, the All Blacks actually fucking did it.

For long periods, it felt like the Boks had them under enormous pressure. The scrum was creaking, the high-ball battle was brutal, and physically South Africa seemed to have the upper hand. But instead of folding, the All Blacks did something we haven't seen nearly enough of lately: they played like an All Blacks team.

They absorbed the pressure. They stayed in the fight. And when opportunities appeared, they absolutely feasted.

Five tries to one tells part of the story, but the bigger story was efficiency. South Africa had pressure, territory and dominance in key areas, but couldn't turn enough of it into points. New Zealand, meanwhile, lived off scraps and somehow made every post a winner. Give them half a sniff and — by God — they took it.

We break down all the ins, outs, heroes, concerns and glorious moments from Test One before turning our attention to Cape Town, where a wounded Springbok side will undoubtedly be waiting with violence in their hearts.

It is going to be significantly harder.

And yet...

We're quietly starting to think the All Blacks might be able to fucking do this again.

Plus, in considerably less important but equally satisfying news, Tony's North Harbour got one over Mark's Auckland in the Battle of the Bridge.

The All Blacks win. Harbour win. Tony wins.

It's all coming up Milhouse.

Springbok fans: commiserations. We're trying not to be smug.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

First up, the All Blacks took on the Stormers in Cape Town and, for a good chunk of the game, it was a seriously butt-puckering affair. The All Blacks stuttered, spluttered and at times played more like poo than an international rugby side, while an under-strength Stormers team — missing their Springboks — gave them absolute hell. The ageless Deon Fourie was somehow still out there causing problems, before the All Blacks eventually located their rugby brains, pulled away late and finished with a 38–21 win.

Then it was the Springboks’ turn, heading to Argentina with plenty of big names left back in South Africa but still carrying some serious quality. Against an under-strength Pumas side, however, they made life look considerably harder than anyone expected.

Cue several days of South African fans and pundits performing Olympic-level mental gymnastics explaining why the Bok performance was actually encouraging while the All Blacks’ was apparently evidence that New Zealand rugby had entered its final death spiral.

The more boring answer? There probably wasn’t that much to read into either game.

Then came Durban.

On a sodden track, the All Blacks faced the Sharks in game two of the Greatest Rivalry series — and suddenly Ma’a Nonu appeared in a Sharks jersey. Because apparently 2026 has completely stopped obeying the normal laws of rugby.

Before kick-off, Nonu produced one of the most surreal and memorable moments of the tour so far, standing alone and returning Kapa o Pango with a one-man haka.

Unfortunately for the Sharks, that was about as competitive as the evening got.

The All Blacks absolutely pumped a young Sharks side 54–0 in what eventually became more training run than test of character. Nonu arrived around the 60-minute mark, produced a couple of nice touches, and reminded everyone that he remains approximately 400 years old and still capable of playing professional rugby.

Elsewhere, Australia edged Japan in a relatively tight affair, we attempt to decide whether anything we’ve seen so far actually matters, and begin the inevitable overanalysis as the real meat of the Greatest Rivalry Tour creeps closer.

Sorry this one’s a little late.

Massive thanks to Sports4cast.com for the beers.

Grab a beer and Enjoy

The 2CGDS. Tony and Mark return to hand out a fresh selection of awards nobody asked for, celebrate the best and worst moments of the rugby year.

But this year’s finale also carries a weight as Gazza, hung up his boots last week. We take a moment to pay tribute to Gazza, Mark’s dad, a regular on his channel and a genuinely good bloke. A true character: warm, funny, honest, and utterly himself in every moment. Gazza brought joy to so many who watched him, and his presence became a much-loved part of the wider Two Cents community. He will be sorely missed.

So grab a beer, raise a glass for Gazza, and enjoy.

England keep marching forward, seeing off a spirited Argentinian comeback as Los Pumas continue to prove they’re becoming a genuine world force. The All Blacks had their turn to comfortably dismiss Wales… though if you squint, you might spot a green shoot or two for the Welsh. Maybe. Hard to say. Probably not.

And over in the “Shambosal Tour of Doom,” Australia rack up their fourth straight loss in Europe — their worst run since 1965 — this time falling to a red-hot French team. At least there were a couple of absolute pearler tries to soften the blow.

All that, plus plenty of rugby chat, nonsense, tangents, and the usual helping of BS

Grab a beer and enjoy!

Grab a beer and enjoy

Massive thanks to todays sponsor Sorcerot!

Sorcerot is a fantasy themed metal band from Northern Kentucky/Cincinnati. There is a full album stream that is free on youtube.

You can purchase CD/Vinyl/Tape through our bandcamp Links: Bandcamp for physical copies: https://sorcerot.bandcamp.com/album/rotten-magick Full album stream on Youtube:https://youtu.be/LiWye7-B2es?si=DwP6fXT7sWzPI_M3&t=1

We chat all that and a lot of BS.

Grab a beer and enjoy

Over in Twickenham, England pummelled the Wallabies with typical English enthusiasm for suffering — helped along by a peroxide-blonde prodigy who has everyone from pundits to your nan saying “this kid is special” with alarming confidence.

And at Wembley, the Springboks reduced Japan to rugby confetti in front of about twelve people and a seagull.

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Meanwhile, in a very wet Perth, the All Blacks splished, splashed, and scrapped their way past the Wallabies. It wasn’t pretty, but it was enough — a muddy finish to a messy season that still somehow ends on a high?

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Massive thankyou to this week's sponsor Raleigh Rugby.

https://raleighrugby.org/ GO THE VIPERS!!

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and Enjoy

Massive thanks to Rugby Debuts. Go Check out their awesome YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/ ⁨@RugbyDebuts⁩

There’s plenty of wallowing, but we also manage to lift our heads long enough to cover the excellent clash between Argentina and the Wallabies, and check in on all the action from the Women’s World Cup.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Grab a beer and Enjoy.

We’ll also look ahead to the Wallabies vs Pumas showdown, dive into the Women’s Rugby World Cup, check in on the Pacific Nations Cup, and give the NPC the airtime it deserves. The hype is real.

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Sorry Tony has audio issues for about 10 minutes near the start,

Over in South Africa, the Wallabies gave the Boks a proper scare of potentially going back to back… until James O’Connor’s boots decided they were made of Play-Doh.

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Thanks to Sports 4 Cats for the beers! Go check them out https://sports4cast.com/4casts/rugby4cast/

Grab a beer and Enjoy

Grab a beer and Enjoy!!

Big thank to Dylan for sponsoring this Episode!

If you want him to take you on a epic hunt email him

dylanafricasafaris@gmail.com

An instant classic? Definitely. But it’ll mostly be remembered for one Giant Call. Lions fans are calling it fine. Wallabies fans are still trying to locate their jaws on the floor.

We unpack the madness, point fingers, praise heroes, and as always, talk a lot of BS.

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Big thanks for the beers https://ruckrackrugby.com/

promo code for 5% off 2CENTS5

Join us as we dissect a weekend of almosts, maybes, and "meh-that’ll-do" performances from the big boys. Expect opinions, overreactions, and the odd tangent (as always).

Grab a Beer and enjoy.

Grab a beer and Enjoy!

Grab a beer and Enjoy!

Plus, there’s the usual helping of BS, distractions galore, and Mark has a therapeutic moment with some delightfully grumpy YouTube commenters.

And the Chiefs? They take care of business against the Brumbies in a no-nonsense semi-final display. Plus, we serve up our usual helping of sideline nonsense — bold takes, bad analogies, and a bit of rugby therapy for long-suffering Blues fans.

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The Blues give us a reason to smile (finally), the Hurricanes absolutely soil the linen, and Super Rugby and the URC wobble their way to the sharp, terrifying end of the season.

Massive thanks to all of you legends for watching, listening, and enabling this strange audio experiment to keep going.

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We Talk about it all and also OTHER STUFF.

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Massive thank you to Nathan Loughnan. Lets get this awesome lad a job!!

https://www.linkedin.com/in/nathanh69/

The Hurricanes and Highlanders gave us a thriller, and meanwhile, the Force and Waratahs officially waved goodbye to finals footy like that one mate who RSVP’d “maybe” but was never coming.Plus,

Tony stares into the crystal ball (or maybe a pint glass?) for another round of Tony’s European Post-Match Predictions.

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Massive Thankyou, the man, the myth, the legend Nathan Loughnan, for sponsoring this episode. Lets get Nathan a sweet sweet job!! Get in touch with him through his LinkedIn below.

https://www.linkedin.com/in/nathanh69/

Tony unloads some explosive thoughts about the Lions' that'll make him some new friends up north. We dive into the Lions tour, cover all the Super Rugby, and return with rugby’s fastest-growing game show: “Who Won These Games That Have Already Been Played!?”

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy!

We also break down the latest in Super Rugby, chat about the Wallabies' shiny new coach, and fire up everyone’s favourite game: “Can Tony predict European rugby results... after they’ve happened?”

Grab a beer, lower your expectations, and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy!

Grab a beer and enjoy!

Grab a beer and enjoy!

We dive into the Aussies making serious noise in Super Rugby and ask the big question: could they actually find success in this year’s Lions series? Spoiler alert... it’s more likely than you think.

Plus, the usual healthy dose of BS.

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Also thanks to our sponsor for this week, Sports4Cast - you can see their awesome algo here: https://sports4cast.com/home/

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It's all happening. Six Nations is getting super tasty with one and Super Rugby is still producing Bangers.

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Massive thank you to the sponsor of this episode, Tweeddale Surfacing Contractors!! Go to their Website - tscnz.com Flick them an email - contact@tscnz.com

If you want to sponsor this podcast give ol Marky boy and email - twocentsrugby@outlook.com

But I tell you what—if you’re after a podcast where the hosts talk shite for at least the first 20 minutes, and then one of them forgets most of the key events from the weekend’s games… you’re in for a treat! (You may also have a brain injury.)

Grab a beer and enjoy!

Massive thank you to the sponsor of this episode, Tweeddale Surfacing Contractors!! Go to their Website - tscnz.com Flick them an email - contact@tscnz.com

Grab a beer and enjoy

Massive thank you to the sponsor of this episode, Tweeddale Surfacing Contractors!! Go to their Website - tscnz.com Flick them an email - contact@tscnz.com

We then get Super Excited about a super start to Super rugby and talk a Super amount of BS. It's Super!

Grab a beer and enjoy

Massive thank you to the sponsor of this episod, Tweeddale Surfacing Contractors!!

Go to their Website - tscnz.com

Flick them an email - contact@tscnz.com

Boy the internet aye...Mindblowing

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Massive thank you to our sponsor for the episode the Hot Jams Band. Check them out.

Online: www.hotjams.ie

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@HotJamsBand

Instagram: @hotjamsband

We also preview the 6 Nations and go over every team's chances or lack of them in Wales's case.

Grab a beer and enjoy!

Massive thank you to our sponsor for the episode the Hot Jams Band. Check them out.

Online: www.hotjams.ie

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@HotJamsBand

Instagram: @hotjamsband

Join us as we celebrate the best and the worst of rugby in 2024!!

Thanks for listening to our weird sh*t talk all year!

Grab a wine and enjoy!!

Thanks to our sponsor Thumbs Up Yacht Delivery for the beers! Check them out on social media or their website:

►http://tuyachting.com/

►YouTube: ‪@DirtyDawgSailing‬

►Instagram: / sailingyachtdelivery

Grab a beer and enjoy

We also eventually get to the Rugby,

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Check out Ballard's website: https://www.ballardboxing.com/ and Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/CxPD1iPxn...

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Grab a beer and enjoy!

Big big thanks to Ballard Barbell and Boxing Club for shouting us the beers!! Check out Ballard's website: https://www.ballardboxing.com/ and Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/CxPD1iPxn...

Big big thanks to Ballard Barbell and Boxing Club for shouting us the beers!! Check out Ballard's website: https://www.ballardboxing.com/ and Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/CxPD1iPxn...

Grab a beer an enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy!

Grab a beer and enjoy!

A massive thank you to 4 Paws for sponsoring this podcast. Please follow below. / 4pawsrun / 4pawsrun

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy

A massive thank you to 4 Paws for sponsoring this podcast. Please follow below.

https://www.facebook.com/4pawsrun

https://www.instagram.com/4pawsrun/

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy!

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy

Grab a beer and enjoy.

Grab a beer and enjoy

Who would have thought a top 8 in a 12-team comp would produce those results!! Well, we have rant, chat the rugger and buckets full of BS.

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We also cover all the happenings of Super Rugby.

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Mark also reveals how he used bowel issues in China for pure evil.

Grab a beer and enjoy!

Grab a beer and Enjoy!

We cover the semis of the Champions Cup and look to who could miss out on the Super Rugby finals. Have the wheels completely fallen off the Crusaders?

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Grab a beer and enjoy.

Tony also flips out about Human centipedes.

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And never fear my little sweet ones; we do talk an almighty amount of sh*t.

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Grab a beer and Enjoy.

We cover the rugby, the players who stood up, the weird state of rules and that call.

Grab a beer or a water and enjoy

Also, we pack in all the nonsense chat a small proportion of you enjoy as we look forward to another week of Rugabee.

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The six nations aren't far away, so we make noises about that, and Mark catches Tony up on all the happenings of the in the World of Rugby that have been taking place over the kiwi summer.

Grab a beer and enjoy!!

This week we unpack Fozzie from a briefcase of sadness in the wake of his announcement he won't run for ABs coach in 2024. We whinge a bit about how crap the "Super Round" in Melbourne, dissect Ardie's naughty gesture and preview this weekend's 6 Nations.

All that and we even look at some other sports and Tony tells a story that has nothing to do with sports but is worth a listen right at the end.

Grab a beer, have a listen and expect some weird tangents.

Also Tony is surprised that a new season of Super Rugby is starting and we get depressed thinking about Wales.

Tony has literally no idea what's happening in the world of Rugby since November and Mark fills him. We also cover, tackle heights, Welsh Drama and celebrate our first gay All Black. Many tangents and a healthy load of BS including some great leg chat.

Listen up!!

This week a whole lot more nonsense, the wins and losses, the ups and down and even a happy ending.

We cover the URC, premiership money probs, the Wallabies squad for their northern tour and of course we talk more World Cup Rugby!!

The boys discuss that and a very interesting story about how Mark's parents met.

The boys give some love to Argies and give their opinions on all things The Rugby Championship.

The All Blacks are in South Africa. The tour is happening. The hype machine is fully operational. And with the first Test still a good few weeks away, we have reached that wonderful stage where there is almost no actual rugby to analyse, so naturally everybody is just speculating about absolutely everything.

The South Africans, in particular, are talking an extraordinary amount of shit about how dominant they're going to be. In some quarters, the All Blacks have already been written off completely.

And then you've got people like Tony, who for reasons that may or may not be grounded in reality, are starting to feel... quietly confident.

Is that confidence justified?

Is it delusion?

We'll find out soon enough.

Until then, this podcast is basically speculation about speculation, followed by some more speculation, as everybody gets increasingly worked up about a series that hasn't even bloody started yet.

There is, however, some actual rugby to talk about.

The All Blacks take on the Stormers this weekend in the first little taste of the Greatest Rivalry Tour. What sort of team do the All Blacks put out? What do the Stormers look like without their Springboks? And why, despite all of that, are we still weirdly nervous about it?

Meanwhile, the Boks are just popping over to Argentina for a casual one-off Test against a slightly depleted Los Pumas side — which, let's be honest, they will probably absolutely rinse.

But all of that is merely the entrée.

The real thing is coming.

The All Blacks are in South Africa. The Springboks are waiting. The shit-talking has begun. The nerves are building. The optimism is getting dangerously high.

It's stressful. It's exciting.

And it is officially on like Donkey Kong.

Grab a beer and enjoy!

A massive thank you to our sponsor for the episode of the Hot Jams Band. Check them out. Online: www.hotjams.ie YouTube: / @hotjamsband Instagram: @hotjamsbandw

Grab a beer and enjoy