I share the story of a relationship that mirrored many of the painful dynamics I experienced growing up, the psychological reasons survivors often confuse chaos with love, and why healthy love can initially feel unfamiliar… even “boring.”

This episode was inspired by a conversation I recently had with a dear friend who has quickly become a driving force in my life and healing journey.

If you’ve ever struggled with trauma bonds, repeating painful patterns, or learning to choose peace over survival mode, this episode is for you.

I open up about the friendships and connections that have recently started healing my nervous system, changing the way I view community, love and emotional safety. I also discuss the impact safe connection has not only on our mental health, but our physical health too - and why healing doesn’t always happen in isolation.

If you struggle to trust people after abuse, this episode is for you. Your fear makes sense. But your community is out there… and the right people will never punish you for being loving.

Healing from abuse changes you. Your standards become higher, your peace becomes sacred, and you begin noticing the people who genuinely celebrate your growth… and those who quietly resent it.

I share my experience of cutting off someone I loved deeply after realising that surviving together does not always mean growing together.

This episode is about grief, healing, boundaries, envy, expansion, and the difficult truth that some people only knew how to connect with the broken version of you.

Some people meet you in survival. Very few know how to meet you in freedom.

After six months away from the podcast, I wanted to come back with an honest conversation about the complicated grief that can come with being no contact with an abusive mother or family. In this episode, I open up about the emotions this time of year brings up for me personally - the sadness, anger, grief, flashbacks, and the feeling of mourning a relationship that never truly existed in the way it should have.

I also talk about what has helped me navigate these triggers, including journalling, allowing myself to feel emotions instead of suppressing them, and learning that healing isn’t linear.

If Mother’s Day is painful for you, I hope this episode reminds you that your feelings are valid and that you are not alone.

Thank you for being here and for allowing me to reconnect with this community again after some time away.

Trigger warning: discussions of emotional abuse, trauma, grief, flashbacks, and family estrangement.

I talk about lost potential, resentment, healing, creativity, and the complicated emotions that come with rebuilding your life after survival. I also share the concept of ambiguous grief - mourning the future, confidence, and version of yourself that was stolen by trauma.

If you’ve ever felt behind in life because of what you went through, this episode is for you.

The Me I’m Becoming is a podcast for trauma and abuse survivors who are ready to feel seen, heard, and supported. In this trailer, I share why I created this space, what you can expect from each episode, and how we’ll walk this healing path—together.

"Leaving abuse doesn’t mean the pain disappears overnight."

In this episode, I share what really happened after I left my narcissistic mother - the sickness, the chaos I kept attracting, and the hard truths of coming down from survival mode after decades. This is a honest look at the recovery stage: the patterns, the setbacks, and the healing journey that slowly leads to peace and freedom.