Let's Dig into That

S3E19 | Cuddling With a Cactus: Love & Attachment Styles

Sat, 23 Aug 2025 17:40:40 GMT

Prepare your safe word because we're pokin' some triggers. Jordan and J.T. are digging into attachment theory, and things could get prickly. Attachment theory explores how early interactions with caregivers influence our ability to form secure attachments and how those patterns can manifest in our adult relationships.

Attachment Styles & Their Impact on Relationships:

Secure adults tend to have healthy, trusting, and supportive relationships.
Anxious adults often crave intimacy but may struggle with feelings of insecurity and fear of abandonment.
Avoidant adults are likely to avoid emotional closeness, may prioritize independence over intimate relationships, and long for connection with a fear of getting too close.

It can be helpful to notice patterns, but the goal isn’t to diagnose everyone. It’s to understand ourselves better—so we can relate with more compassion, not more control.

Fill In the Blank:

The best relationships are ___________.

a. Uncomplicated

b. Like a team

c. Safe

Moving Towards Secure Attachment:

Self-Awareness: Understanding each partner's attachment style is crucial for recognizing the patterns and triggers in the relationship.
Open Communication: Both partners need to communicate their needs and boundaries clearly and vulnerably.
Therapy: Couples or individual therapy can provide support and guidance for addressing attachment patterns and developing healthier relationship dynamics.
Self-Regulation: Both partners can work on regulating their emotions and developing a sense of security within themselves, rather than relying solely on the other.
Building Trust: Creating a safe space for vulnerability and emotional connection can help build trust and foster a more secure attachment style.

For Any Anxious Love Ninjas:

Delay the impulse to reach out—set a timer for 15 minutes and do something nourishing in the meantime.
Movement: walk, shake, dance out the jeebies
Breathe! Try a slower exhale.
Journal the worst-case scenario - then write a compassionate response to it.
Send yourself the text you want to send to your partner.
Reframe the mindset: “I can survive discomfort without needing immediate resolution,” or “Just because they’re distant doesn’t mean they’re leaving.”

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? It would mean the world if you had a second to SHARE this episode - or your favorite episode! If you haven't already, please SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage at letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU, Love Ninjas! The impact of your support is greater than you can imagine.

S3E18 | Silence & Stillness: Seeking Peace In the Chaos

Sat, 16 Aug 2025 14:00:28 GMT

In a culture of constant stimulation, stillness is a skill, an act of resistance. When was the last time you truly experienced bone-deep, cellular silence? What does the noise help us hide? Join Jordan and J.T. as they explore the idea that peace is not found in the absence of chaos, but in our refusal to be controlled by it. Listen to discover:

- Reliance on external validation can keep you small

- Dr. Brené Brown: Proving is a prison!

- Power of the pause: Is your response aligned with who you are or how you (momentarily) feel?

- Stillness as a radical act of inner protest (aka some folks won't care for your desire to change)

- The effect of our hyper-connected, 24/7 accessibility on our nervous system and anxiety

- It's ok not to be liked.

- Regulation Station: beep beep!

- The chaos isn't going anywhere. How much chaos are you willing to consent to?

- ENERGY! Your energy (your tank) is your POWER. Sacred expenditure on unimportant stimuli.

- Silence is not a sign of weakness. The quiet is not fear or indifference, but intentional consideration: clarity.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E17 | Milestones, Schmilestones: Time Is a Scam and You're Not Late

Sat, 09 Aug 2025 14:00:17 GMT

Jordan and J.T. deconstruct the traditional life timeline and explore why we should reclaim our nonlinear stories. Listen to discover:

- The subtle tyranny of "by this age, I should have..."

- Who decides if we're "on track?" Is "being on track" setting us back?

- Goals vs. Milestones: who keeps score?

- Reframing 40 not as a crisis, but a quiet rebellion.

- Relationship milestones that aren’t "We’re Pregnant!"

- Is being chosen overrated? How can we choose ourselves more fully more often?

- Is there a petty timeline flex you're secretly proud of?

- The power of celebrating personal success

**Let us know! What is a nontraditional milestone you feel we should celebrate? (Ideas: Freedom and Rebellion Milestones, Emotional Milestones, Petty But Powerful Milestones, Slightly Feral But Totally Valid Milestones, etc.)

- Love Ninja Milestone: "Realized I wasn’t the problem... but also wasn’t the main character."

- JT's Next Milestone: took a nap instead of seeking validation.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E16 | Good GRIEF: When a Casserole Doesn't Cut It

Sat, 02 Aug 2025 17:08:40 GMT

This episode is brought to you by: FEELINGS (the weirder the better)

Grief doesn’t wear black every day. It can show up in your dreams. Or as a specific smell. Or your playlist shuffles to that one song... We're genuinely curious: Is it ok to laugh at a funeral...?

Instead of trying to make grief appear anything other than messy, Jordan and J.T. dig into the all-too-turbulent discomfort of loss. Listen to discover why the real-life grief ambush is part of the process. (You’re not broken. You’re just… HUMAN.)

- What part of grief did no one warn you about?

- How can we carry opposing emotions at once (sorrow and joy)?

- Ghosted in Grief: Why some people disappear instead of showing up when you’re grieving.

- The Grief that Doesn’t Get Flowers: Uncelebrated griefs like estranged parents, friendship breakups, lost dreams, not having kids

- Micro-grieving: the catharsis of a good public or bathroom cry

- Spiritual platitudes that should be retired (Time heals all wounds, What doesn't kill you...etc)

- When can we feel JOY without GUILT while grieving?

- What happens when you remove/replace coping crutches? The power of new rituals - and poetic playlists.

- LDIT's Grief Manifesto: "We believe grief is not a problem to fix— it’s a sacred, shitty, wild thing we carry..."

- GOOD IDEAS on how to be there for those you love: send a one-line text (no response required), drop off snacks with a note "grief doesn't cook," invitation to non-grief activity (karaoke, trashy TV marathon, hike, dog park.,.), just be quiet together, say their person's name

The Deepest THANKS, ADMIRATION, & APPRECIATION to: Andrea Gibson, You Better Be Lightning (Button Poetry, 2021) ...a super hero on earth...rest in peace

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E15 | Vanity: Mirror, Mirror, WTF?

Sat, 19 Jul 2025 21:11:38 GMT

Mirror, mirror, WHAT THE DEUCE?

Vanity can be touchy: secret angles, shame zones, squishy bits. Jordan and J.T. explore how our self-worth can become entwined with our appearance. Can you carry both your "divine light" and your body dysmorphia? Listen to discover:

- Pride in appearance vs reliance on external validation

- Insecurities we work hardest to hide

- Where and when did you first learn that looks were currency?

- Who said what that made me hate myself for having cellulite?

- Differences between maintenance, pride, and vanity

- Inflating achievements, status symbols, and the self-doubt cycle of social comparisons

- What’s the first thing you always notice about yourself in the mirror?

- Vanity shame: what can we do to heal?

- What is our cultural programming around appearance and worth?

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E14 | GAME DAY! Uncomfortable On Purpose: Questions You'd Rather Not Ask...But Should

Sat, 05 Jul 2025 14:49:13 GMT

Ready to get weird and wise? Jordan and J.T. play the first round of Uncomfortable On Purpose. Think Truth or Truth: the questions you’d rather not ask your partner but really should.

This round cuts deep. A provocative and revealing Q&A-style game that digs beneath the surface. Topics we usually tiptoe around—shame, addiction, fear, failure—but with the goal of healing, not harm. A darkly playful excavation of your emotional scar tissue—because healing can be sexier with a bit of risk.

The FIVE subversive and intentionally uncomfortable categories are tailored to spark meaningful conversation, shared vulnerability, and unexpected insight.

CATEGORIES: Spicy Confessions, Past Lives, Mirror Work, Trigger Warning, and Romance Round 2!

Real talk about second chances at love, adult intimacy, and all the weird, wonderful shit that comes with being human.

Don't just eavesdrop - try it! If you'd like a starter kit of playful heat, send a request to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Let the awkwardness be part of the vibe.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E13 | Comfort Is a Killer: How Convenience Is Robbing Us of Real Connection (and Sex)

Sat, 28 Jun 2025 13:06:58 GMT

Ever paid for that $40 DoorDash burrito in a sweaty delivery exchange and thought: Who am I, and what is this life? Modern convenience just might be killing our joy. If comfort were a drug, we'd all be addicted. If you're curious about what convenience might be doing to your curiosity, not to mention your capacity for emotional resilience and connection, join Jordan and J.T. to discover:

- How dopamine-on-demand is numbing our ability to feel real connection or desire

- The 5 Conveniences that Quietly Corrupt

- How does avoidance-based/one-click living impact our resilience and empathy?

- Does a comfort addiction make you an entitled asshole?

- What GPS does to our brains & the impact of engaging with strangers

- Is Amazon Prime the biggest threat to modern marriage?

- Suffering, friction, delays, and the recipe for real connection

- Convenience sex/instant swipe gratification: do we remember how to want or wait?

- Strategies to combat convenience culture

- Is there a connection between convenience dependence and anxiety?

- Climate Control: our literal and metaphorical need to feel good

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E12 | Can You Outgrow Your Personality? And Other Existential Spirals

Sat, 21 Jun 2025 13:49:18 GMT

One would hope we evolve, learn, and change over time, but can we outgrow our personality? What if you're only pretending to like spicy margaritas and karaoke? Has the Party Guy era come to a close? If you're staring at an unrecognizable vision board from 2018 or seeking permission to change your mind, join Jordan and J.T. for a raw discussion of personality. From identity and reinvention to trauma disguised in "that's just me" habits, listen to discover:

- What is personality? Your Enneagram? Your Spotify Wrapped? Your career title or coping style?

- Does all evolution/growth require a complete existential breakdown?

- The influence of outside perspective, external motivation, and validation

- The tension between branding yourself and being yourself

- Are we boxed in by our own stories? I'm the wild one...I'm the sensitive, empath.

- Are we allowed not to spiral? Is inner peace a thing?

- Why evolution feels both terrifying and liberating

- How to get comfortable with I don't know who I am right now

- Unconventional approaches to surviving the spiral

- The moments that prompted "wait, who am I?"

- Retiring roles: Do we grieve, burn, or feel free?

Literary Shout Out: Sheila Heti, How Should a Person Be? (Picador, 2012)

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E11 | The Long Game of Self-Love In a World of Instant Gratification with Alyssa Scarano, LPC

Sat, 14 Jun 2025 12:00:11 GMT

Whether it's your mental heath, or simple wellness practices, living an intentional and purposeful life starts within - and no one knows that better than Alyssa Scarano, Licensed Professional Counselor and Founder/Owner of The Collective Therapy & Wellness. Looking to swap external approval for internal validation, join and Jordan and J.T. as they learn Alyssa's techniques to cultivate real, meaningful connection in a fast paced digital world.

About ALYSSA:

Alyssa Scarano, LPC, NCC, is a Licensed Professional Counselor and the Founder/Owner of The Collective Therapy & Wellness. Known for her empathetic and compassionate approach, Alyssa views her work as a profound privilege—an opportunity to be invited into the most intimate and vulnerable parts of her clients’ lives to offer unwavering support and grace. Specializing in relationships, Alyssa is dedicated to helping individuals heal from childhood trauma, break generational patterns, and cultivate meaningful, authentic connections by first fostering a compassionate relationship with themselves.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E10 | Anxiety: The Party Crasher (That Lectures You in the Kitchen)

Sat, 07 Jun 2025 13:13:24 GMT

Join Jordan and J.T. as they unzip their emotional fanny packs and lay bare their most anxious parts. J.T. shares details from his recent low-key little breakdown and his proactive approach to working with his overprotective anxiety.

Fun fact: Anxiety isn't brokenness; it's biology. From fight, flight, or freeze to shame in the sheets, it seems no one is immune.

Listen to discover:

- Low-impact, high-reward anxiety coping tools that work (...if implemented)

- Naming it, instead of shaming it: the power of saying "I'm anxious right now"

- Anxiety as the protector and the saboteur

- Lies our anxiety tells us

- When we pass off anxiety as intuition

- Where do you feel anxiety in your body? (Somatic reflection)

- Act! Go outside, rage dance, breathe, write, scream, skip...

- If your anxiety had a love language, what would it be?

DISCLAIMER: Let’s Dig into That is not a replacement for therapy. The advice, recommendations, and tips discussed are provided as thought-provoking, curiosity-poking insights aimed to inspire conversation, not as specific professional, therapeutic, or psychiatric guidance. Views and opinions expressed are from personal experience and perspective. Listener discretion is advised. Please seek the mental health care that best serves your needs.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E9 | Engage Your Heart, Improve Your Finances: Demystifying Money with Ed Vargo

Wed, 04 Jun 2025 13:11:24 GMT

It's time to talk money. Who's sweaty? Jordan and J.T. welcome Ed Vargo, the Co-Founder and CEO of Burning River Advisory Group and EnlightenHer, to discuss and demystify our finances. Ed believes a financial education shouldn’t make you feel small; it should make you feel powerful.

Ed’s passion for helping women with their finances stems from his childhood. His mother, an immigrant from South Korea, had four children with his father. After getting a divorce, she lost custody of her children due to her inability to support her family financially. Her unfortunate lack of financial literacy fueled Ed’s passion to empower women so that they can move through divorce confidently and without fear.

Listen to discover:

- How do we remove our emotional response to money so we can feel empowered when we manage our finances?

- Financial coaching: so, it doesn't need to be overwhelming, condescending, and confusing?

- The most damaging money myths we need to bust

- Raising financially educated kids

- Money scripts that aren't serving us and how to change them now

- Meaningful vs meaningless spending? When to have the talk?

- Ed's thoughts on combining finances. How about the second time around?

About Ed:

Ed Vargo is the Co-Founder and CEO of Burning River Advisory Group and EnlightenHer, a community focused on financial mentorship for women. With over 20 years in financial services, Ed helps women navigate long-term financial planning for all life stages, including retirement, college, and transitions related to divorce or death. His dedication is personal; inspired by his mother’s financial struggles after his parents' divorce, Ed is committed to empowering women to confidently manage their finances and avoid similar hardships. He is a member of the Financial Planning Association® and the Society of Financial Service Professionals. Ed is married with five daughters, ages 18-24, whom he has raised to be financially empowered young women!

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E8 | Round 3! Q&A: Where Curiosity Meets Blushing Vulnerability

Sat, 31 May 2025 14:00:14 GMT

The Season 3 Questions are in - THANK YOU for your boundless curiosity! Jordan and J.T. are ready for the gauntlet of vulnerability, prepped to flex a little bravery and self-compassion.

Join the conversation for a mix of sexy, spicy, and slightly uncomfortable questions intended to crack us open and connect us all.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E7 | A DIVORGASMIC Conversation with The Good Divorce Coach, Karen McNenny

Sat, 24 May 2025 14:00:13 GMT

Jordan and J.T. could not shake the idea that the alleged "end" of a relationship could be DIVORGASMIC, so they invited the Coach who coined the word to learn more. From the adjustment of being re-singled to giving yourself permission to seek joy, how can we better love and support each other in times of transition?

Karen McNenny, The Good Divorce Coach™, is changing the way families navigate divorce. We can agree that divorcing families are starved for better outcomes with less debt, destruction, and despair. Karen's signature Good Divorce Experience™ guides couples through the legal process of getting divorced, but more importantly, she teaches her clients HOW to be divorced. With her guidance, Karen’s clients learn to navigate the path of their divorce in a new way, with more hope for their family and compassion for themselves and their former spouse.

About KAREN:

Karen McNenny is a mediator, divorce coach, and therapist dedicated to transforming how families navigate divorce. Through her Good Divorce Experience™, she helps couples not only get divorced but also learn how to maintain healthy post-divorce relationships, especially when children are involved. With more than 25 years of expertise, Karen focuses on co-parenting, financial planning, and relationship literacy, guiding families toward compassionate outcomes. A TEDx speaker and host of the The Good Divorce Show Podcast™, Karen draws from her own divorce journey to offer hope and healing. She lives in Missoula, Montana, with her family and dog, enjoying the outdoors in the Rocky Mountains.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E6 | Why Grown-Ups Need Fun (More Than They Think)

Sat, 17 May 2025 14:00:16 GMT

From fun-haters to play-daters, when did we stop prioritizing delight? Is it irresponsible for adults to play, or is fun essential for a fulfilling life? No idea what fun means to you anymore? You are not alone! Join the conversation to discover:

- The elements of True Fun: playfulness, connection, & flow

- When did fun start to feel more like a luxury than a birthright?

- Know thyself: how can we treat fun like a spiritual practice rather than a break from work?

- The evolution of fun: exposing false or toxic fun; does scheduling fun kill the vibe?

- What are the signs you're in the flow?

- Why does fun sometimes feel like guilt, shame, or rebellion?

- Retrospective fun vs. the pleasure of anticipation

- Fun disconnectors and disrupters (like J.T.'s FOMO)

- The duration and intensity of joy vs. pleasure

- Looking for a good time? Cheap and cheerful ideas: go outside, hike, bike, picnic, volunteer, free museums, library date, swim, (pretend) camp, go to the beach, farmer's market, games, scavenger hunt, sidewalk chalk!

Fun is not a crime. But if it were, we’d be on the run!

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S3E5 | Dr. Adam Dorsay is Super Psyched to Unleash the Power of Connection

Sat, 10 May 2025 14:00:28 GMT

WOW! Buckle up, Love Ninjas, because Dr. Adam Dorsay is in the house! Silicon Valley's licensed psychologist, executive coach, author, and podcast host delivers mic-drop insights from his book Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection & Live the Life You Love.

This book changes the game. Join Jordan and J.T. as they dig into connection with the author himself. From his highly regarded TEDx Talks, lively keynotes, and award-winning podcast Super Psyched, Adam is the guru of gusto. Starting with a connection to self, determine what fills your cup. Adam shares his Connection Formula, a personalized prescription for a more fulfilling life. Don't miss the magic!

**If you're in a music rut, inspiration awaits!

THE MAN: Doting husband, father of two boys, and recent cat-loving convert. Connect with Adam on his website DrAdamDorsay.com, tune in for the podcast Super Psyched, and if you haven't already, treat yo'self and BUY THE BOOK!

THE BOOK: Adam Dorsay, PsyD, Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection & Live the Life You Love (Amplify, 2024)

THE MUSIC: George Michael, Prince, Rush, Wham!, Taylor Hawkins of The Foo, Enya...

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? It would mean the world if you had a second to SHARE this episode - or your favorite episode! If you haven't already, please SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU, Love Ninjas! The impact of your support is greater than you can imagine.

S3 E4 | Emotional Infidelity: When Flirt Turns To Hurt

Sat, 03 May 2025 14:00:14 GMT

What is emotional infidelity, and who defines the line? Is it cheating, or are you just insecure? From a work spouse's special privileges to reconnecting with an old flame, Jordan and J.T. explore deep emotional connections outside the primary relationship. Join the conversation to discover:

- Micro-cheating: emotional affairs that begin as platonic friendships

- No physical contact necessary; it's time to talk about boundaries

- What is missing? What issues in the primary relationship cause us to seek emotional support and/or intimacy elsewhere?

- Signs of emotional infidelity: constant contact, deep sharing, secrecy, feelings of guilt, etc.

- The 7 Stages of Emotional Infidelity

- Flattery, flirtation, fixation, and fantasies

- Who is the priority? Does the friendship bond surpass that of the primary relationship?

- Complaining to the friend about the partner...would the partner approve?

- DMs and fire emojis: what is the threat of emotional infidelity online?

- Is emotional cheating real cheating? The significance of intent and impact.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? It would mean the world if you had a second to SHARE this - or your favorite episode! If you haven't already, please SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU, Love Ninjas! The impact of your support is greater than you can imagine.

S3E3 | Gratitude Adjustment: Why It Is a Gift to See the Good

Sat, 26 Apr 2025 13:41:09 GMT

For anyone who has been told you should be grateful at exactly the wrong time, this episode is for you! For anyone tired of living a fear-driven life, this is the place! Could gratitude be the secret to lasting happiness, a gateway drug to growth? While Jordan and J.T. aren't making any promises, they are more than willing to flesh out the magnitude of gratitude. Join the conversation to discover:

- Gratitude is not about ignoring challenges but reorganizing the good

- Does gratitude come from the brain or the heart? Or both?

- Acknowledgment, respect, and a desire to understand: the foundation of giving a damn

- How do you practice gratitude without gaslighting your pain?

- The healing power of giving a hoot

- How a gratitude practice can enhance perspective

- Appreciating the specific, no gratitude is small

- Gratitude is emotional: notice and name what you feel

- Performative gratitude, toxic politeness, and gratitude as an act of rebellion

SHOW NOTE to make you go WOW: After he led the massive 2014 Venezuelan protests that swept the nation, opposition leader Leopoldo López was sentenced to more than a decade of solitary confinement in a military prison. His story is one of astonishing mental resilience, the strength of the human spirit, and the power of gratitude.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? It would mean the world if you had a second to SHARE this episode - or your favorite episode! If you haven't already, please SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU, Love Ninjas! The impact of your support is greater than you can imagine.

S3E2 | Near Enemy: It's Not What You Think...It's Scarier

Sat, 19 Apr 2025 14:00:26 GMT

Whoa! If you are unfamiliar with the concept of near enemies, you are not alone. Dr. Brené Brown strikes again! With a dose of Buddhist philosophy and Jordan and J.T.'s boundless curiosity, prepare to discover how these imposters can sabotage our goals.

- Near enemies: subtle concepts that feel so close to our aim or goal that we may not recognize them as enemies. Near enemies make us think we are achieving what we hope to achieve, but in reality, they hinder our growth.

- The importance of discernment: how we fool ourselves into thinking we're close when things are actually unraveling.

- Examples: A near enemy of compassion is pity. Connection's near enemy is control. For love, it's attachment. Mindfulness can appear dangerously similar to complacency.

- The Four Immeasurables or Divine Abodes: a set of four Buddhist spiritual practices focused on cultivating positive mental states. These practices include loving-kindness, compassion, sympathetic joy, and equanimity.

- What it means to rise up to compassion.

- How pity can be poisonous, and sameness can destroy

- Common humanity: what a novel idea!

- How the nuances of near enemies can lead to feeling wholehearted or brokenhearted.

- Equanimity vs indifference: #lifegoals

SPECIAL SHOUT OUTS of Notable Significance: Christopher Germer, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and Lecturer on Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, specializing in mindfulness and compassion-based psychotherapy. Dr. Germer and the infinitely inspiring Dr. Brené Brown motivated this curious dig into human behavior. Thank you, thank you!

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? It would mean the world if you had a second to SHARE this episode - or your favorite episode! If you haven't already, please SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU, Love Ninjas! The impact of your support is greater than you can imagine.

SEASON 3!! Spite: The Power to Motivate or Muck It All Up

Sat, 12 Apr 2025 13:51:03 GMT

S3 Ep1: Spite: The Power to Motivate or Muck It All Up

The petty desire to hurt, annoy, or offend someone else - spite is uniquely human. While spite is often considered vengeful, malicious, and desperate, if harnessed correctly, spite can also be one hell of a motivator.

Join Jordan & J.T. as they explore the power of spite from social justice and spite architecture to karma and the influence of the revenge body. In this episode, discover:

- The distinction between healthy motivation and spiteful revenge

- Motivating functions of spite: overcoming doubt and achieving goals

- Whether spite is the path to petty or power

- Guilt by association and appealing to spite

- Spite as a form of selfish punishment (to cut off the nose to spite the face)

- Resentment, anger, and negative outcomes

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? It would mean the world if you had a second to SHARE this episode - or your favorite episode! If you haven't already, please SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU, Love Ninjas! The impact of your support is greater than you can imagine.

SEASON 2 FINALE: Travel! Let's Get Somewhere

Sat, 22 Mar 2025 14:00:10 GMT

Jordan and J.T. wrap up Season 2 talking TRAVEL! Forty episodes of Let's Dig into That...so it's about damn time!

From a relaxing reset to extreme adventure, travel can heal and transform. Travel can also threaten your bank account, your relationship, and your intestines. Jordan and J.T. explore the unexpected benefits of stepping out of our routine and practicing flexibility on the go. Join the conversation to discover:

- Why people don't travel and why it's worth reconsidering

- What it means to prioritize intentional living

- The power of a perspective shift

- Benefits and challenges of leaping out of our comfort zone

- Sympathy and Empathy: what changes with lived experience

- Adventure advocates reframe stress in terms of growth and value

- How travel can redefine 'home'

- What the heart wants: familiar cabin, repeat road trip, beach, city, woods

- The importance of community; what we have in common

- Misconceptions, myths, and other excuses

- Safety, fear, and money: the fun stuff

- Exploring the takeaways of travel

Season 3 promises to be spicy, enticing, packed with vulnerability and inspiring interviews. Don't miss an over-share. Jordan and J.T. return mid-April. THANK YOU for the magnificent first forty!

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? It would be a dream come true if you had a second to SHARE this episode - or your favorite episode! If you haven't already, please SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage at www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU, Love Ninjas! Your support means more than you can imagine.

S2E19 | Trust: Build, Break, Repeat

Wed, 19 Mar 2025 14:00:13 GMT

From trust in relation to self-love to building trust within a group, Jordan and J.T. break down the T-word to better understand what happens when we risk sharing something important, making ourselves vulnerable to someone else's actions. In this episode, discover:

- Are some people more naturally inclined to trust?

- Human disposition toward trust: the duality of trust and fear

- Dr. Brené Brown's Anatomy of Trust on BRAVING connection: Boundaries, Reliability, Accountability, Vault, Integrity, Non-judgment, Generosity

- Competence and Integrity: breaches of trust and the inverse diagnostics

- Repairing trust (two-sided decision) versus forgiveness (a choice to let go, move forward)

- Fundamental Attribution Error: a cognitive bias where people tend to overemphasize personality traits and underemphasize situational factors when explaining others' behavior while also attributing their own actions to external circumstances

- Agency and trust: I want to think the best of others

- The importance of psychological safety: opportunity for mistakes to lead to growth

- Counterfeit trust: common enemy intimacy

- Foreclosing on trust and the value of sincerity

“I don't trust people who don't love themselves and tell me, 'I love you.' ... There is an African saying which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt.” ― Maya Angelou

Literary Shout Out: Charles Feltman, The Thin Book of Trust, Third Edition: An Essential Primer for Building Trust at Work (Berrett-Koehler Publishers, 2024)

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? It would mean the world if you had a second to SHARE this episode - or your favorite episode! If you haven't already, please SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU, Love Ninjas! The impact is greater than you can imagine.

S2E18 | Could Our Flaws Make Us Awesome?

Sat, 15 Mar 2025 14:00:09 GMT

Sure, we've heard nobody’s perfect, but what if we stopped seeing our flaws as roadblocks and started seeing them as our edge? Jordan and J.T. explore the idea that perceived weaknesses often evolve into strengths. What if we all started feeling flawed and fabulous?

Join Jordan and J.T. as they dig in to discover:

- Why markers and metrics don't tell the whole story

- How recognizing unconventional gifts in young people can have a long-term impact

- When a perceived imperfection propels us forward

- What can we learn from the kids? Be bold, confident, accountable

- Strengths outside the social norm: pushback on unconventional life paths

- ADMIRE OUT LOUD! When we notice courage, problem-solving capabilities, inclusion, bravery, say something! Praise in public.

**If you have a perceived flaw that rocked your world or became your reason, or an experience when imperfection led to greatness, please let us know! Comment on Instagram, Facebook, or email letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? It would mean so much if you had a second to SHARE this episode - or your favorite episode! If you haven't already, please SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU, Love Ninjas! The impact is more meaningful than you can imagine.

S2E17 | The Magnificent Power of Female Friendships with Rachel Steiker

Wed, 12 Mar 2025 14:01:02 GMT

Love Ninjas, please welcome our SPECIAL GUEST, Jordan's adult bestie: Rachel Steiker, better known as STEIK!

Rachel and Jordan have been through some stuff - some big stuff. From meeting in the dorms as college freshman - Jordan with her DIY perm and Steik sporting an eyebrow ring - to IVF injections in the California desert, twenty-three years is a long time to actively, intentionally, truthfully friend.

J.T. is curious about what makes female friendships such a force: the effort, understanding, and compassion required to evolve alongside a real friend, the seasons of female friendship, and the tough conversations he's convinced most dudes don't have. Is J.T. a teensy jealous of Jordan's Life Wife? Join the conversation to discover:

- Female Friendships: Is there a more steadfast bond?

- Real friends call you on your shit

- What makes a good friend? Maintenance, boundaries, mutual respect, and ...

- Why showing up when it's inconvenient or unnecessary can mean the most

- Accountability: uncomfortable truths and healing

- Friendship through major life events: from alcoholism to motherhood

- Setting an example for the next generation

- Friendship and community: balance, belonging, safety in numbers

- Steik and Jordan's love language: SNACKS...and walks... Ok, planning vacations while walking toward snacks.

About RFS:

Rachel F. Steiker is the Managing Director at codelab303 in Boulder, Colorado. She is a leader in digital production and custom software management. After graduating from the University of Missouri—Columbia with a degree in Journalism, Steiker was brave enough to live with Jordan in their first adult apartment. An avid truth-telling traveler, adventurous advocate, and badass bestie, Steiker now resides with her own non-drinking, tattooed dude and their two brave, beautiful dirt-bike-riding daughters. (Her husband has asked we not mention the cat, Mochi. They're in a whole thing.)

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S2E16 | Coping with CHANGE: Mindset, Muscle Memory, & Micro-Adjustments

Sat, 08 Mar 2025 14:51:17 GMT

Big topic. Tiny couch. Change is tricky. From a change in dinner plans to a systemic overhaul, we cannot escape the inevitability of change. Jordan and J.T. want to improve their adaptability skills and, if possible, their emotional reactions. Can we ever adjust to the tension between comfort and growth? Join the conversation to uncover how change might be opportunity playing hard to get.

- Fear, anxiety, your stomach drop out? How a little puke could be a sign of potential

- Create opportunities to tiptoe out of your comfort zone: how intentional discomfort can improve our ability to manage change

- Resistance as an opportunity to reflect: identifying feelings and emotions BECAUSE of their energy

- Self-awareness: why everyone should have a Feelings Wheel

- How to improve our change mindset with practice

- Opportunities to make change work for you rather than against: visualizing scenarios

- Power of the Pause: before we react, use emotional power to take control of our journey with change (they call this adaptability!)

- The FRACTAL theory of change: to change the world, change yourself. Patterns scale upward and downward. The micro reflects the macro; the macro reflects the micro

- Encouraging individual action and agency: Be the change you want to see in the world - Mahatma Gandhi

NOTE on Cassandra Worthy: Jordan mispronounced her name and was compelled to send an apology letter. Enamored with Cassandra's empowering perspective and invaluable insight, join Jordan and J.T. for their NEXT READ:

Cassandra Worthy, Change Enthusiasm: How to Harness the Power of Emotion for Leadership and Success (Hay House Business, 2021)

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E15 | Redefining Success: Personalizing Prosperity

Wed, 05 Mar 2025 15:00:25 GMT

The Joneses you idolize, the envy-hungry pursuit you somehow initiated... NEWSFLASH: The Joneses are bunk...rubbish, bollocks. They will always be willing to spend more than you (or at least incur more debt). They'll lie to you on social media with their high-production snapshots, tempting you with admiration. You have turned their perfection into your life's mission. Pause. Take stock. If you measure success by what someone else has, you have an opportunity (nay, a responsibility) to dig into WHY you're chasing their want.

Jordan and J.T. discuss the rewards of evaluating and updating our personal definition of success. Join the conversation to discover:

- Cultural conditioning: measuring success through accomplishment, attainment, or acquiring upward mobility or wealth

- What happens when internalized messages from the outside world are out of line with personal values

- Defining success by your own sense of fulfillment and progress, achieving goals that are personally meaningful to you

- Shifting focus from the outcome: the importance of personal growth through the process

- How do we separate true success from symbols of success?

- Imposter Syndrome: a psychological phenomenon characterized by persistent feelings of self-doubt, inadequacy, and a fear of being exposed as a fraud, despite evidence of one's competence

- The power of perspective...and matching skivvies

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E14 | Adult Chores: Managing Time Like a Grown-Up

Sat, 01 Mar 2025 13:58:38 GMT

How do we stay in the moment, remember to put our phones down, invest in family time while working our tushes off to prepare for the increasingly unpredictable and expensive future, and then pretend we give a flying Ferd about the laundry??

J.T. claims he's the big picture guy, that the dishes can wait because the clock is ticking on the time to create. Jordan wants to live from the big picture perspective, and she will just as soon as the dishes and the laundry are done - dogs walked, thank you notes sent - then she can breathe deep and start to imagine.

Can we stay inspired in lieu of snippy when it comes to adult chores? Who is leading the charge to get shit done? In this episode, discover:

- Value of intentionality: time poverty and the never-ending To Do List

- Division of labor, keeping score, and resentment

- Decision fatigue meets perfectionism = nothing gets done

- The importance of motivating rewards

- Holistic future planning

- Family Meeting vs. Chill Fam Hang: it's never the right time for the tough conversations

- Emotional prep for later life: social and spiritual diversification

- Swedish Death Cleaning: more than decluttering, a permanent form of organization that makes your everyday life run more smoothly (International bestseller written by Margareta Magnusson)

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E13 | Radical Honesty & The Dangers of Politeness

Wed, 26 Feb 2025 14:29:49 GMT

It's truth-tellin' time!

Jordan and J.T. have set up camp in the land of Exhaustive Honesty. While they sleep well at night, the dangers of telling the truth still lurk in the landscape. In a relationship that began as a makeshift confessional, when does the truth become an emotional liability? Listen to discover:

- Benefits of owning what's real and right for you

- Radical honesty in a relationship: full disclosure, no filter, vulnerability, active listening

- Boundaries and flexible expectations to combat fear and shame

- When honesty is weaponized or crosses into the oversharing of opinions

- How politeness and societal norms can create distance in a relationship

- Politeness trap: avoiding discomfort with passive-aggressive behavior

- The power of I don't know and introspection

- When does politeness mean wearing a mask to maintain a relationship?

Brad Blanton, Radical Honesty: How to Transform Your Life by Telling the Truth (Sparrowhawk Publications, 1996)

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E12 | Manifestation: Dream BIG, Little Dipper

Sat, 22 Feb 2025 15:00:13 GMT

If it were a contest, Jordan would win. She's the believer, the Manifestation Maker, a sign-reading aspiration junkie focused on the long game. J.T. sees Jordan's wall of vision boards and has witnessed her savvy work, but he's unsure about magic (...in general) and the freedom to dream without apology. With miracles on the line, listen to discover:

- Hello Universe! Forget about me?

- Negative self-talk as the #1 manifestation obstacle

- Why the courage to dream big is essential

- Comparisons, faith, social media: what it means to operate from a limited belief system

- How do we learn to trust the process?

- Intention, action, and faith: maintaining balance

- What you think about, you bring about...what fires together, wires together...and other brainy clichés

READING LIST:

Dr. James R. Doty MD, Mind Magic: The Neuroscience of Manifestation and How it Changes Everything (Avery Publishing Group, 2024)

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage at www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E11 | Midlife-ish: The Joy & Angst of Aging

Wed, 19 Feb 2025 15:01:12 GMT

J.T. woke up feeling dangerous...using obscenities like midlife and aging, euphemisms for a body slowing down. He wants to dig into the thrill of getting older one month before Jordan's (41st) birthday...Brave soul.

In this episode, Jordan and J.T. explore the connection between the mind and body during midlife-ish. Listen to discover:

- Whether midlife brings more clarity or confusion

- How aging shows up emotionally

- Aging myths Jordan and J.T. are not buying into

- Play, play, play

- Wisdom and the body's general lack of firmness

- Is midlife a phase of continuation or reinvention?

- Shed the Ego: external versus internal validation

- In-house fitness mantra: I do not need to win my workout.

- Don't wait to be nice to your body! Take the compliment - receive the words.

- Your greatest wealth is health. - Virgil, Roman poet

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Don't miss the next episode! Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E10 | Round 2! Q&A: You Asked, We Answered

Sat, 15 Feb 2025 11:11:34 GMT

THANK YOU, Rage Pirates and Love Ninjas! You asked...now Jordan and J.T. are jonesing to answer. From relationship rules and vulnerable risks to unorthodox advice and travel tips...it's not exactly rapid fire. This episode promises to poke your comfort zone and get you thinking about connection.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Did you enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW us on the homepage, www.letsdigintothat.com, or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU—your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E9 | Vulnerability Hangovers: Sounds Like a YOU Problem

Wed, 12 Feb 2025 15:00:42 GMT

You went there; you said the True Thing about yourself - and the reaction is an "emotional cringe." Have you ever felt judged or criticized after a moment of vulnerability? If you've experienced "sharer's remorse" after opening up, rest assured you are not alone!

A vulnerability hangover is characterized by feelings of shame, guilt, regret, and fear that usually occur in the aftermath of taking an emotional risk, a temporary state of emotional self-doubt after being vulnerable with another person or group. (THANK YOU (again!) to Dr. Brené Brown for gifting us with the language to describe the discomfort.)

While J.T. thinks this condition might be reserved for Jordan's over-sharing tendencies, she feels her highly sensitive dude is susceptible to feeling the hangover of being judged for his authenticity.

In this episode, discover:

- What if my nature isn't on brand with society?

- How culture is responsible for our hangover

- Is judgment (or lack of acceptance) a reflection of another's personal shame?

- Vulnerability as a measure of courage (shoutout Dr. Brené!)

- What does it take to feel accepted? Validating our authenticity

- Hangover cures: self-compassion, seek support, channel of forgiveness, self-care

- Build gradual trust one step at a time

- The power of being YOU and ability to liberate others

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S2E8 | The Concept of Forever: How? Why?

Sat, 08 Feb 2025 15:00:42 GMT

Who doesn't want to hear forever insights from newly-ish weds...on their second time around? Is forever a fairy tale ending or a voluntary life sentence? Join Jordan and J.T. as they flesh out what it means today to entertain the idea of forever.

In this episode, discover:

- Curiosity: why the long haul requires an open mind

- Forever, Never, Always...the danger of absolutes

- Threats to the F word: broken trust, the nonlinear nature of life

- Growth, healing, and change in the context of forever

- Recovery: where does forever meet one day at a time?

- Individuality: how to support the weird and wonderful

- Jordan advises working forever backwards and leaning into what you love today

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E7 | Resistance Exhaustion with Renée J. Gentry, Esq: How To Give a Shit & Not Give Yourself Shingles

Wed, 05 Feb 2025 15:00:52 GMT

When you’re born with a call to serve, an activist activated by the personal obligation of “WE the people,” what happens when the exhilaration of resistance takes its toll? The exhaustion of living the fight for what’s right. Who helps the helpers?

Let's Dig into That is thrilled to welcome an arts-loving, wine-sipping vigilante of justice! Serving as an attorney, law professor, and dedicated philanthropist, this woman is a tireless advocate, a model of hard work and tenacious passion – and Jordan and J.T. are convinced she must be whipped. Renée J. Gentry, Esq, is here to walk us through reconnecting and recharging when the world lets us down.

Soak up some inspiration and discover:

- Tools and rituals to combat the negativity and the power of a positive mindset

- How to recharge and reclaim hope: where self-care meets service

- Resistance exhaustion and choral music: the energy of the group and the importance of rest

- Vicarious trauma and personal boundaries

- Connection and why sometimes it's best to call a five-year-old

- Motivators and needs: from playing your music loud to learning how to unplug

- Taking an oath as an attorney: is there a duality of self? The Citizen/Public Self and the Private Self?

- Reconnecting with our power: how can we give a shit and not give ourselves shingles?

About RJG:

Founding her own law firm in Washington, DC, in 2019, Renée J. Gentry, Esq is a leading expert on vaccine injury litigation in the National Vaccine Injury Compensation Program (NVICP) with over 20 years of experience. RJG is the Director of the Vaccine Injury Litigation Clinic at The George Washington University Law School and a Distinguished Professorial Lecturer in Law. In addition to the Clinic, she previously taught Disability Rights Law and the healthcare component of the Systemic Racism Reading Group.

This talented Love Ninja has served on the Board of Governors for the U.S. Court of Federal Claims Bar Association, is a founding member and President of the Vaccine Injured Petitioners Bar, and is a member of the American Association for Justice. She’s the 2020 recipient of the Court’s Golden Eagle Award. In March 2024, RJG testified before Congress in the House Committee on Government Oversight on the need for modernizing the VICP.

Ms. Gentry is a member of the Bars of the District of Columbia Bar, the US Court of Federal Claims, and the US Court of Appeals for the Federal Circuit. She has been featured in The New York Times, Bloomberg Law, Politico, National Geographic, Reuters, and Health Affairs, as well as on NBC News (Washington, D.C.). She also once had a pet duck named Jackson 5.

S2E6 } SERENITY NOW! Our Need to Control the Chaos

Sat, 01 Feb 2025 15:00:10 GMT

Join Jordan’s spiral as she explores her relationship with control, her compulsory need to provide (unwanted) help and (unsolicited) advice. The impulse to control seems rooted in Jordan’s self-proclaimed codependent tendencies, providing her with an illusion of safety and complicating the way she shows love. In a casual chat gone critical self-reflection mission, Jordan and J.T. discuss:

- The increased desire for control in times of uncertainty, control as a coping mechanism for chaos

- Costs of rigidity and loss of power

- Disruptions, distractions, and trusting the process: the micro-growth of surrendering control

- Allowing life to unfold (easier said than done): practicing flexibility with expectations, not values

- Why surrendering to the experience is only possible with acceptance

- The quiet search for peace Jordan continues to postpone

- Diggable Reminder: QUIT gaslighting yourself!

Next on Jordan and J.T.’s reading list:

Mel Robbins, The Let Them Theory (Hay House LLC, 2024)

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E5 | The Realities of Romance

Wed, 29 Jan 2025 14:59:02 GMT

Thanks to YOU, the Love Ninja Listeners, it was brought to Jordan and J.T.'s attention that in all their talk of sex and intimacy, they did not use the word romance - not even once.

In our busy culture of swiping and with the surge of the single and powerful, is romance on anyone's mind? Join the conversation as Jordan and J.T. explore:

- What is romance? Is it a need, a want, a dated pursuit?

- The Rom-Com roadmap that leads straight to a restraining order.

- J.T. describes the balance between the mystery of romance and the unpredictability of surprise.

- Does an act of romance imply expectation and/or reciprocation?

- False romance, love bombs, and the stories we are told.

- How success in romance begins with listening.

- Why Jordan and J.T. feel it is time to start asking for what we want.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

S2E4 | Sleeping Arrangements: More Sickly Than Sexy

Sat, 25 Jan 2025 15:00:24 GMT

A good night’s rest – a dream we all chase. The importance of sleep is in no realm revolutionary. From brain health and metabolism to regulating hormones, mood, and body temperature, the work we do in bed matters. While J.T. cherishes the intimacy of sharing one mattress, the onset of illness has Jordan camping out in the guest room. By night six, J.T. fears she’s getting too comfortable. Jordan assures him he isn’t far off. Join the conversation to discover:

- Bedtime rituals and bad habits

- How going to bed angry can lead to waking up kind

- Anxiety: need we say more?

- Success tales of marriage-altering sleep studies

- Sleep deprivation and functionality: Jordan’s occasional titty baby status

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S2E3 | Maintenance Sex/Scheduled Sex: Does Intentionality Threaten Intimacy?

Wed, 22 Jan 2025 15:00:43 GMT

Does putting sex on the schedule reduce satisfaction? Jordan argues that intentionality and anticipation are reason enough to jump on the dirty date night wagon. J.T. shares his experience with a calendar that unfortunately led to...crickets.

While the word schedule might not have the best connotation, the planning and prioritizing of intimacy might be transformative for a relationship. What are the odds that you both are in the mood at the same time? Free from distraction and regrettable bloating?? If you and your partner share a consistent connection, can you still expect the same pressure around birthdays, holidays, anniversaries? We plan for vacations and life aspirations, so why not sex?

Listen to discover how to approach your partner if you’re feeling disconnected, how talk and touch can get you back on track, and ways to embrace the awkward. Let this episode be an inspiration for the imagination.

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

If you have an inquiry or topic you’d like Jordan and J.T. to dig into, please send an email or voice memo to letsdigintothat@gmail.com

S2E2 | Rebuilding Connection with Cassie FREAKIN' Fortman (Pt 2)

Sat, 18 Jan 2025 15:00:11 GMT

CASSIE IS BACK, and it is time to talk about the WINS! Let's dig into the good good. If you missed Part 1, do yourself a favor; this heroic journey is not to be missed.

Following up on Cassie's devastating exit from a high-control church community and experience in therapy while earning a degree in Design, in this episode, discover:

- the self-love rituals and practices that helped Cassie to reconnect

- how to shine a light on what makes you feel authentic

- positive self-talk, a cozy environment, and the power of checking in

- shout out to mental health and therapy tools for healing

- Cassie's evolving relationship with God

- the importance of surrounding yourself with your people

- the healing power of a pet pig (Hip Hip Hooray - Cheers to Henny the Hog!)

- REMINDER: it is a choice to get bitter or better

More on Cassie: Founder of the Grand Mesa Business Guild and Program Manager at Delta Innovation Workspace, Cassie operates two sensational Creator spaces packed with resources and a network of talent and services. Cassie is the accountability guru who motivates and supports small business owners, fosters ideas, and generates actionable plans to get your goals off the ground. A proud Colorado native, Cassie is an avid photographer, artist, and unparalleled friend. She likes to paint, journal, two-step, and cuddle with her pet pig, Hennessy.

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

SEASON 2 KICK OFF! Rebuilding Connection: The Choice to Get Bitter or Better with Cassie Fortman (Pt 1)

Wed, 15 Jan 2025 16:10:47 GMT

Cassie (FREAKING) Fortman is here! Buckle up, beautiful friends. Season 2 opens with a 2-Part conversation that takes CONNECTION to the next level.

J.T. and Jordan are joined by Cassie, the Guiding Connector, a dynamic designer and Founder of the Grand Mesa Business Guild, to discuss her heroic rounds of reinvention. Cassie bravely shares her unthinkable journey from indoctrination to freedom and healing from religious trauma.

At the age of 27, Cassie celebrated her first birthday in nearly a decade. Following a divorce that, within her church family and community, ended her very existence (aka she died), Cassie was faced with rebuilding her entire network of support and connection, down to uncovering her most pure, authentic self. This magnetizing, resilient human being reminds us of our inherent power, how simple it is to take better care of ourselves, and why we all have the choice to get bitter or better.

In Part 1, discover:

- Why strong women are often drawn to religious extremism

- The threat of a single, independent (thinking) woman and the appointment of Cassie's second husband

- The five months to feign grief between a divorce and marrying a stranger

- The public shaming of being disfellowshipped or shunned by the church

- Cassie's love of design and (the once forbidden) journey through higher education

- How COVID robbed Cassie's graduation but cued another reinvention

***Join us for PART 2, when Cassie shares her WINS and the details of her self-care transformation.

More on Cassie: Founder of the Grand Mesa Business Guild and Program Manager at Delta Innovation Workspace, Cassie operates two sensational Creator spaces packed with resources and a network of talent and services. Motivating and supporting small business owners, fostering ideas, and generating actionable plans, Cassie is the accountability guru to get your goals off the ground. A proud Colorado native, Cassie is an avid photographer, artist, and unparalleled friend. She likes to paint, journal, two-step, and cuddle with her pet pig, Hennessy.

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

SEASON 1 FINALE: What Are Your Intentions With A Spankin' New Year?

Wed, 01 Jan 2025 15:12:50 GMT

SEASON 1 FINALE! Jordan and J.T. will return on January 15, 2025 with MORE saucy secrets, even BETTER production, and a lineup of AWESOME guests.

At the close of 2024, we can recount our missteps and resolve to do better. OR we can reflect on the challenges we overcame, the moments of pride, and set our intention for opportunities in the new year. A new calendar is permission to start fresh. Whether you have a list of personal improvements laminated on the fridge or choose to focus on one big dream for the year, join the conversation to discover:

Resolutions...friend or foe?
Let go of what doesn't serve you - easier said than done
The power of the mini-adventure
Misogi: a Japanese ritual that has evolved into a personal development approach for gaining confidence and courage
Visualizing the future and setting measurable goals
The importance of getting out of our comfort zone

CHEERS to a happy, healthy, and creative 2025! Be brave, beautiful friends.

Season 2 airs 1/15/2025.

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

Mission 2.0! Why We Do What We Do & What We Can Do Better

Sat, 28 Dec 2024 15:00:21 GMT

At Let's Dig into That, the goal is to remain honest and curious - to promote intentional connection through meaningful conversation. Jordan and J.T. honor Season 1 by reflecting on their mission. On track to inspire difficult conversations, Jordan and J.T. pledge to dig even deeper, focusing on intentional vulnerability and mindful connection. In this episode's quest for accountability, discover:

The biological benefits of being there for someone else
A space for healing to happen
What it means to feel empowered
Motivations and support systems
Friendly reminder: USE YOUR WORDS

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

Holiday Episode: Traditions!

Wed, 25 Dec 2024 14:00:51 GMT

PARENTAL WARNING: Kris Kringle is outed on this episode. WE BELIEVE, but you don't have to!

While J.T. and Jordan pride themselves on variety and spontaneity, there is something about this time of year, the customs and beliefs carried down by generations – ‘tis the season for traditions. From Jordan’s New Year’s Eve fire ceremony to J.T.’s committed relationship with Santa, join the conversation to discover:

-the power of traditions (for better or worse)

-the significance of symbolic behaviors

-unique traditions from around the world (from cheese rolling to baby jumping)

-find your group: how a sense of belonging, stability, and the transmission of values can come from a variety of sources

-starting new traditions: serving the community, rituals involving nature, fortifying connections

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

Memory: The Pleasure of Forgetting Something New Everyday

Sat, 21 Dec 2024 15:00:13 GMT

How does memory factor into being present in the moment? To what degree can we trust our self-serving remembrances? How does memory factor into forward-thinking? While Jordan has a detailed recall of flavors and aromas, J.T. carries vivid snapshots of extreme highs and traumatic lows. The mind, the senses, the impact of photo albums, and stories told again and again, what should we be thinking when it comes to memory? Join the conversation to discover:

-Fight, flight, and the triggering of unsavory memories

-The proficiency of the olfactory

-The power of prospective memory and recalling preset intentions

-The Mandela Effect: when a group of people share a false memory of a specific event or person

-Mental Prep: what to do now to improve memory in the future

-Selective memory’s role in relationships

Literary Shout Out:

Bessel van der Kolk, The Body Keeps The Score (Viking Press, 2014)

Find value in the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

Compromise: Why We're Fighting & What We're Fighting For

Wed, 18 Dec 2024 15:00:31 GMT

Compromise is not self-sacrifice, nor is it a healthy cover for manipulation. Unhappy compromise is likely to lead to heavy resentment. Jordan prepares her defense when faced with a negotiation, wary of giving too much away. J.T. offers insight from the other side, highlighting compromise as an opportunity to connect and reap Win-Win benefits. Curious about the prospect of reframing compromise? In this episode, discover:

-How mutually beneficial solutions exist in the presence of concessions

-Difference between good intent and control and the importance of peaceful surroundings

-Benefits of presenting two (and only two) options

-The power of counteroffers

-Why collaboration and accommodation encourage unity in the long run

-Consistency: sticking to the (com)PROMISES you made when the time comes

-Values, self-esteem, time with family, career goals: what are your non-negotiables?

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

Intermittent Sobriety: From Stigma to Sexy?

Sat, 14 Dec 2024 16:50:48 GMT

Jordan and J.T. met in the wine business. Fourteen years later, J.T. went to rehab, and Jordan cleared out her cellar. Sharing their individual motives, methods, and innovative approaches to healing, Jordan and J.T. explore the cycle of stigmas surrounding sobriety.

Amidst holiday reverie, how do you avoid the celebratory cocktail? Who could even think of inviting Carol since we’ll be serving Sangria?! If you are “sober curious,” or perhaps your drinking buddy just put down the bottle, join the conversation to learn:

· Is it possible to socialize sober in today’s culture?

· How am I supposed to maintain relationships without alcohol, let alone date?

· When not drinking suddenly means no longer invited.

· Will life be boring without booze?

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

Literary Shout Outs:

Ruby Warrington, Sober Curious: The Blissful Sleep, Greater Focus, Limitless Presence, and Deep Connection Awaiting Us All on the Other Side of Alcohol, (HarperOne, 2018)

Caroline Knapp, Drinking: A Love Story (The Dial Press, 1996)

Laura McKowen, We Are the Luckiest: The Surprising Magic of a Sober Life (New World Library, 2020)

Holly Whitaker, Quit Like a Woman: the radical choice to not drink in a culture obsessed with alcohol (The Dial Press, 2019)

Self-Discipline: Tedious Impulse Management or The Key to Growth & Freedom?

Wed, 11 Dec 2024 14:10:11 GMT

“Through discipline comes freedom.” – Aristotle, Greek philosopher

Self-control and consistent routine – all aboard the fun bus! Jordan and J.T. find themselves in a momentary state of mediocre self-discipline. How is it possible when he spent more than a decade as a calorie-counting vegetarian athlete? Jordan, a non-drinking entrepreneur with a first-degree black belt, struggles with her dormant capacity to keep her eye on the prize. Join the conversation to discover:

- Can you be disciplined if you don’t know what you want?

- The power of writing down specific, actionable goals

- What it means to “create a predictable success framework”

- Learn seven tips to boost self-discipline

- Invest in personal strengths in lieu of focusing on points of weakness

- How an accountability partner can improve personal habits

- Don’t underestimate the importance of positive self-talk and milestone moment rewards

Enjoy the conversation? Please take a moment to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW on the homepage www.letsdigintothat.com or wherever you find your podcasts. THANK YOU – your click means more than you can imagine.

Fantasy: Curious Play or Threatening Taboo?

Sat, 07 Dec 2024 14:00:21 GMT

Fantasies, daydreams, visions – the imagination is a powerful tool. Is sexual fantasy a form of intimacy? A way to sustain desire and feel more connected? Jordan and J.T. answer listener questions as they dig into the wonder of fantasy. Whether you want to keep your steamy scenes to yourself or incorporate your creativity into your real-world relationship, you are not alone. Tune in for insights and advice on:

- Communicating with your partner: how a positive feedback loop can transform ick into a deeper bond

- America’s seven most common sexual fantasies

- The magic of bypassing reality and inner blocks

- Novelty, romance, sexual fluidity, control: why taboo is not an excuse

- Curiosity and anticipation: how to embrace the unexpected

Join Jordan for her next READ: Gillian Anderson, Want: Sexual Fantasies by Anonymous (Bloomsbury UK, 2024)

The Culture of Education with Dr. Patty Templeton Smith

Wed, 04 Dec 2024 14:30:10 GMT

“Negative reinforcement stops behavior; positive reinforcement changes behavior.”

– Rick Lavoie, M.A., M.Ed., author of The Motivation Breakthrough

Jordan and J.T. are thrilled to welcome Dr. Patty Templeton Smith as the first guest on Let’s Dig into That! Dr. Smith honors the pod with her wit and wisdom, inspiring an unmissable conversation on education…and aerospace...and passion.

Join Jordan and J.T. to discover:

- How a change in administration impacts education

- The scope of parent choice

- Current value of higher education

- Power of the teachable moment

- Motivation: positive and negative reinforcement

- "Are you there to teach – or make sure everybody learns?"

About Patty:

Dr. Patty Templeton Smith is a champion of child development, a motivation wizard, and the queen of creative learning. Earning her Doctoral Degree in education from the University of Missouri-Columbia, Dr. Smith has taught at the elementary, secondary, and university levels. Spending most of her career in the public school system, Dr. Smith currently consults for a French immersion charter school in Kansas City, Missouri. As a final ‘teacher candidate' for NASA’s 1986 Challenger Expedition, Dr. Smith shares deep ties with National Aerospace and the Space Program. Founder of Missouri Young Astronauts, Dr. Smith continues to inspire generations of curious minds. And she just so happens to be Jordan's mom.

The Art of Listening

Sat, 30 Nov 2024 14:56:30 GMT

“Listening is suspending disbelief.” Rick Rubin, The Creative Act: A Way of Being

While hearing is automatic, listening is intentional. What are we missing when the desire to be understood is lost in another’s need to respond? Jordan’s self-awareness about her status as a multitasking interrupter – the personal anecdote interjector – has led to a more proactive approach to listening. J.T. explores retention issues when we half-ass the words, tone, and even the body language being shared.

In this episode, discover:

- Active listening requires a combination of the right attitude and attention

- The importance of asking questions and paraphrasing to ensure understanding

- Listening does not include formulating an opinion or preparing a response

- When to empathize, provide solutions, or just…listen

Episode 10! Q&A: You Asked & We Answered

Thu, 28 Nov 2024 02:36:39 GMT

THANK YOU, Listeners! In an attempt at rapid-fire Q&A, Jordan and J.T. tackle the gamut, from their most embarrassing moments to advice on talking to your teenager about sex. Unwilling to shy away and anxious to dig in, your questions inspired quite the conversation.

A special mini-shout out to @handsomepod (34:18) for Fortune's shared love of the sitcom Designing Women. (Mae, it has been confirmed by the high school best friend that Jordan also wrote a letter to Angelina Jolie - and proceeded to forget about it.)

TEN EPISODES! Please keep your curious topics and invasive inquiries coming –letdigintothat.com or @letsdigintothat

Money Talk: Love and Finances

Sat, 23 Nov 2024 16:20:07 GMT

Why is it so hard to talk about money, the taboo topic that can often make or break a relationship? Combining finances…sign of "healthy love" or a suicide mission?

No matter your financial personality (the frugal saver who fell for the generous shopaholic), it’s best to get the conversation started – sooner rather than later – because one thing is for sure: cash will come up. Join J.T. (the financial free spirit) and Jordan (the stat tutor) as they weigh in, discussing triumphs and tragedies in their own fiscal history. J.T. shares advice on why checking your ego at the door is critical and the importance of celebrating “little wins.” Jordan advocates for regular financial “dates” to ensure partners are on the same page and working toward shared goals. Learn why transparency tends to be the best option and how joint goal-setting can empower a partnership.

Jealousy: It's Complicated

Wed, 20 Nov 2024 15:25:44 GMT

Jordan views jealousy in a partner as a threat to her independence, “possessive, controlling, and a total buzz kill.” J.T. sees his jealousy as “healthy,” a protective response to some combination of anger, anxiety, fear, and insecurity.

In this episode, discover:

- Distinction between jealousy and envy

- How Jordan and J.T. used compassion to set boundaries, allowing for a shift in mindset

- Signs of a jealous partner

- Jealousy and Fear: fear of a relationship ending or of not being good enough

- Get a taste of the couple’s deep respect and admiration for Dr. Brené Brown. If you want "to access a universe of new choices and second chances," do yourself a favor and find a copy of her book, Atlas of the Heart.

The Choice Not to Have Kids

Sat, 16 Nov 2024 21:51:08 GMT

Growing up, it was never a question of if - but how many. Children were the guarantee that came with the partner and picket fence. It was the assumption – and so they tried.

Why did J.T. and Jordan attempt to procreate with others and ultimately decide to live child-free together? In this episode:

- J.T. discusses his journey from painting a nursery to a premature, medically advised vasectomy at age 34, how he reframed fatherhood, and his capacity to nurture.

- After surgery on her “cuterus” and years without a single pregnancy, Jordan recreationally attended adoption meetings and credited the universe for the resolution not to freeze her eggs.

- Discover how Jordan and J.T. attempt to impact the next generation and the outreach they find most rewarding.

Kindness: Grand Gesture or Simple as a Smile?

Wed, 13 Nov 2024 18:25:41 GMT

“Kindness is seeing the best in others when they cannot see it in themselves.”

November is KINDNESS month. Jordan and J.T. explore what it means to be kind to yourself and its impact on the greater good.

- Jordan describes her intentional efforts to be kind as a practice of anticipating needs.

- J.T.’s habit of starting his workday with an awareness pause and his belief that small gestures can positively impact global goodwill.

- The kindness inherent in “getting involved in the community” has positive biological effects on well-being and happiness.

- Is kindness as critical to our health as sleep and exercise?

- Punchline: Please don’t be a dick.

The Bullshit of Lying to Yourself

Sun, 10 Nov 2024 17:20:54 GMT

Self-deception is how many of us get through the day: “I’ll start my diet tomorrow,” or the flattering angles reflected in a “skinny mirror.” What about the lies we tell to protect our image - the lies that could snowball into an identity we don’t recognize?

Jordan (the compulsive exaggerator/plan canceller) and J.T. (the shapeshifter) share the biggest lie they told themselves. In this episode, discover:

- Why we might not feel empowered to tell the truth.

- When “fake it until you make it” became bad advice.

- Can giving pieces of our truth away start us down a path of inauthenticity?

- So, I’m a liar. What now? Tips on accountability and compassion.

Friendship Matters: how do we emotionally invest in the right people?

Tue, 05 Nov 2024 19:11:11 GMT

- J.T. shares his envy surrounding complex female friendships and his confusion about why he cannot participate using the same language.

- Jordan discusses how she stays connected with her close circle and offers tools for J.T. to cultivate a stronger support system.

- Do friendships with the opposite sex require different boundaries?

Body Image Battles

Wed, 30 Oct 2024 21:40:18 GMT

“My body is a reflection of my mindset. I sense collusion.” – Jordan, Cellulite Owner

Past, present, and…hopeful. Whether we see ourselves accurately or in the fun house mirror of self-shame, body image hits the Let’s Dig into That sweet spot – it’s a topic nobody really wants to discuss. Join us as J.T. divulges his calorie-restrictive career in athletics and how his self-image was not found in the mirror but in the eyes of any woman who glanced in his direction. Jordan offers a gentler path of living in your own skin after actively participating in the requisite self-disgust of being a woman for more than two decades. Everyone’s got their own shit…let us rejoice and not recoil.

Fear: How Much is Healthy?

Sat, 26 Oct 2024 16:23:38 GMT

“Hope and fear cannot occupy the same space. Invite one to stay.” – Maya Angelou, American Poet, Memoirist, and Civil Rights Activist

While fear is essential and universal, it can also be torture. Jordan and J.T. share personal milestone moments impacted by fear, discuss the relationship between fear and alcohol as two recovering people-pleasers, and share ideas on how to combat the fear-based standstill.

Sex After Divorce

Thu, 24 Oct 2024 19:35:43 GMT

“…for women, 40 is the golden age – to get divorced.” - Ali Wong, American Comedian and Actor

Jordan and J.T. open up about Sex After Divorce. Her ten-year relationship led to a rebellious rebound, while J.T.’s intimacy trauma caused quasi-intentional celibacy. Get to know the curious couple as they explore coitus post-breakup:

- Self-esteem: I've still got it! Or do I?

- Authenticity on the rebound

- Intimacy vs. sexuality

- The sexy effect of your personal values